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December 5, 2008

E-mail to Parents

The following is an e-mail that I started to write to my parents and then just kind of exploded. I didn't send them this e-mail who e-mail. Anything below the cut did not get sent them. The names have been changed to make sure I do not get fired from my job!

To: Mom and Dad
From: Laney
Date: Um Today (duh!)
Subject. I am not not picking up the phone.

Okay I am not picking up the phone but for a very good reason. The trackball on my phone stopped working so ATT told me to go to the warranty replacement center. They replaced my phone, track ball working and everything, for free! No activation fee either! Only when I finally get home to look up Jen's phone number to make a phone call guess what. It sounds like I am under water! I am going to try again tomorrow morning and hope that maybe it just needs to sync up to the network properly but if not I will have to journey back to ATT tomorrow to get this fixed again!

Thank you so much for looking up that book for me. I am now 43 out 50 on the waitlist. I didn't move up, but the waitlist got longer. LOL! I guess we know what I will be asking for Christmas. Still it is to bad because I finally figured out how to make audiobooks work on my laptop so that the screen goes dark but they keep on playing so it's kind of like falling asleep while listening to a book which I used to do all the time. Only now the problem is I wake myself up because I am so interested in the book and then force myself to stay up again. But at least I am getting a few hours a night. I am hoping that once finals are over and my brain relaxes more I will be able to sleep again.

[text after this did not get sent]

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October 19, 2008

What is the freaking point of Alltel?

I mean seriously, I see their ads all the time. Their phone plan rates look okay. However, when I go to their website and enter my zip code they say they do not provide coverage for my area! WTF! Why bother wasting money for TV ads if I cannot buy a cell phone from you!

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October 8, 2008

Of which Fe is needed

This last week I thought I was going to die! I had to go to the doctor’s office to get my annual physical before my jobs changed over and therefore my health insurance changed over. It’s a long story but basically I still work at the same location just under a different employer. Yes I am vague about this for a reason, have you read about the numbers of people who get fired from there jobs because they blog about them and the people find out about it and they get fired! Thank you, I’ll skip that!

Anyway the doctor said that I had to do another blood test because even though my liver enzyme test came back normal my hematocrit was low, which is the fancy way of saying that I am anemic. I refuse to believe this but I do like saying the word hematocrit, maybe that is my problem. So she tested for that, gave me a flu shot, and looked at the lump on that has been bothering me cause it’s just hanging out there on my left side. The lump was nothing, something about a collection of fat or something, anyway not a big deal. The flu shot didn’t hurt as much as I thought it would. The iron test was annoying but they only took three tubs of blood as opposed to my normal seven to eight tubes of blood when the do my liver tests.

I have decided that I do not like needles. I cannot look at them as they go into my skin. Granted I’ve never tired to look at them while they are going into my skin but I see them there lying on the table and I just have to look away.

Oh in other big news the doctor was not happy that I was not sleeping. Yeah well, umm… Anyway she gave me a sleeping pill, which has been working. Yay!

So I go to work the next day, I think I am going to die. I think the combination of the flu shot and me starting my period was just too much. I was weak, shakey, and thought I was going to throw up several times throughout the day. But I had to stay. There were these important binders that had to be put together for an important presentation. I stayed. Finally around 2 PM I started to fill better, I opted not to eat as I was not sure what would happen if I did but I did manage to stay the full day! Go me!

I don’t like feeling like I have to throw up. So now the newest theory is that because my hematocrit (there’s that word again) levels are low that is why I get sick when I get my period. Oh and that I have to go see a GYN so that my periods can be more regulated and I do not loose so much blood. A) do not like GYN’s last time they did a PAP it made me bleed and it hurt for two days! B) my insurance is changing in like two days.

So doctor says I must buy this iron supplement which I am totally opposed to because I am not anemic I tell ya! Oh and she says once my insurance changes I must go to GYN so that my periods will be more regular. GYN will not do that though because of the liver thing. I cannot be put on the pill because of it. Hell I probably shouldn’t even be taking the sleep pill but apparently I need to sleep so I guess I have to take it.

Grr!

Oh well. TTYL!

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July 31, 2008

Funny little things

So I was renewing my lease with my brother the other day because he had to co-sign with me when I first signed my lease 2 years ago because evil Vitamin Shoppe cut my pay when they transfered me. Anyway!

We got to the part of the lease where I had to initial next to the rules to indicate that I agreed with them. I started putting my initials down and handed the paper to my brother. He said that I didn't initial I put the "at" sign. I said no, I put the "e" sign cause my initial is ek with a circle around it only after signing my name twenty times I gave up and just did e with a circle around it. Then we got into a conversation regarding where the "at" sign came from and what it's name was.

Well I found out. Please click on the following link to find out:

WHERE IT’S AT: http://www.worldwidewords.org/articles/whereat.htm

Just thought I would share!

Have a great day!

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July 12, 2008

Crawling out from under a rock

Hi Everyone!

I know it's been forever and a day since I've posted. I'm actually thinking of re-doing this site completely. Not sure how though because I still want it to cross-post to my livejournal but I'll figure it out.

Anyway I'm waiting to hear back from UMBC to see if I can start my career as a social worker. Okay not really start, but at least start my major.

On the plus side I found out that my mom and dad want to take me to Peru when I get my Bachelors degree! I'm super excited about this and now am more motivated to finish school and get my Spanish up to par because I'm not going to Peru and not being able to speak my own language!

I also want to learn the native language which is Quechua. But I think that might be a goal for later on as no one here speaks it.

Well I should get back to work I have to finish reading at least one article from the NY Times and make a post about it before I go and head out to see the Lion King!

Super excited about that! WOOHOO!

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January 6, 2008

This Just In: Laney never updates!

Okay seriously though that can’t be news to anyone! LOL! I kind of feel bad because I’m sure some people read this, well used to and probably don’t anymore because I never update but maybe I’ll start to update more and then people will start to comment more, yeah!

Alright let me see… I got promoted! Or rather I will be. I start my new position at my job toward the end of January. I’m very excited about it because I am going to be learning a lot about training. I have to talk to my project manager though because there is one class that I really want to take and I am hoping she will let me “How Adults Learn.” We’ll see.

Relationships: Don’t make me laugh. Right now I’m seeing anyone, thinking of seeing anyone, anything. Maybe that will change. I don’t know. I’m not looking because honestly the only guys I ever seem to find attractive are the ones that are already married or have girlfriends (for example: every guy I’ve ever dated.)

Television: The writer’s strike is totally bumming out man! I love TV. You know I do. I’m a very good American because I’m such a good TV watcher. But when they show crap shows because there no more new episodes of my normal shows it makes me upset. Thank god Netflix is back on. I turned it off while I was taking my class.

I took a class on Controlling Stress and Tension at my local CC. I got an A! I’m so so proud! I’m wicked smart! LOL! I’m enrolled in another course too, or at least I will be after tomorrow. I have to wake up extra early so that I can deposit a few checks and then I can enroll in my course. Don’t want the bank balance to bounce. God I hope the class I want doesn’t fill up!

Just have to say it again: I GOT AN A IN MY CLASS!!!!!!

Well that’s it for now. Hope all is well with everyone! Happy New Year!

For New Year’s, so I would not be left alone like I was on my birthday, I called up my friend Sue and asked her she had plans. She said no. Then I said well could I bring over some food and you, me and Chris hang out. She said so you are inviting yourself over. I said yes. It worked though. We had a really good time and the lasagna that I made tasted really good. A couple of our other friends showed up too so fun was had by all! No toasting though, none of us are drinkers

TTYL

Laterz,
Laney

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November 21, 2007

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

I know I haven't posted in a while. Okay ages! Months even!

I've been busy. I'm taking a class now at the local CC here and I'm doing very well! So far I have an A.

At my job I've been offered the chance to move positions which is kind of like a promotion without actually being a promotion, lol.

My family's been through the ringer because of my ESIL (evil-sister-in-law) who was threatening lots of stuff but it seems under control now.

Johnson has had a cold since July and I have no idea what to do about it. He is not acting sick!

umm.... Yeah that's it!

Anyway I'm still alive. Barely but I'm hanging in there.

I haven't been sleeping much but that could be because I just don't sleep well anymore. Therefore I'm always tired so I've started taking caffeine pills to stay awake at work. Probably not a good idea but I don't like coffee so...

I just have to say this again: I'M GETTING AN A IN MY CLASS!

Okay so it might not stay that way but hey for the majority of the class I got an A which means I can totally finish with a B for the semester!

TTYL!

Laterz!

Laney

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July 31, 2007

My quick review of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

If you haven’t finished the book than please do not click on the link.

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July 25, 2007

A very Hairy weekend!

Hi everyone! So I know it's been forever since I've posted but really there hasn't been much to post about. My birthday was on July 4th, it was quite and I loved it. I went and hung out with Sue, her boyfriend, and her mom and they were wonderful to me! They even got me a cake. Than that weekend I went with my brother to DE and we had more cake there. All and all I gained back all of the weight I lost *eek* but that's okay it's only temporary and I’m totally back on track with eating right.

Let’s see… On July 20th I went to my local Boarders and picked up my wristband for being on the waitlist for the brand new Harry Potter book, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows. Can you believe it, the waitlist! Crazy! Anyway I went back for the event which started at 9:30ish but I was too scared to go in at first so I talked with Jen for a bit on the phone. I’m not kidding. There were a ton of people there. But it was so much fun. There was this one girl who was about 10 maybe a bit older and she was dressed as Bellatrix Lestrange and she totally had the best costume there. They had a contest but this cute little baby girl whose mom put her in a “witch” costume won instead. I use the word witch loosely because the costume was only witchy because of the witch’s hat the baby had on. Anyway it was great fun and the Boarders employees were so funny because they took their jobs so seriously.

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This entry has been tagged: hairspray, hp, nmht

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July 2, 2007

Why Holiday Birthdays Suck!

Okay so I’ve been bad and I totally have not been posting my calories for three days now!

Mostly that is because I have not gone above 1200 calories and I’ve been totally feeling awful about it. I swear I do not have an ED. I just don’t like healthy food so I don’t tend to eat that much of it. Weird, I know.

So anyway I totally woke up sick and didn’t eat much at all because I didn’t feel good. So tonight I forced myself to eat some hotdogs. Hotdogs do not have as many calories as you think they do. And if you eat them they way I do you can actually have four hotdogs and still have fewer calories than any McDonald happy meal.

Today I’ve had a grand total of 1215 calories. I have no idea how much fat or carbs and I’ve kind of decided to stop counting the carbs because it’s too much trouble.

So far since I’ve started this, we are on Day 8 now, I’ve lost 5 pounds, and kept it off! Woot! Go me! Although my IQ seems to have dropped dramatically because I just tried to spell lost and kept with an “ed” at the end of each. Hmm…

Okay so at work today I entered in six classes! A record high for me! But it’s good because that means I only have eight more classes to enter tomorrow and on Thursday.

My friends hate me though. Just because my birthday happens to be on a national holiday they seem to think that it’s okay not to at least invite me to whatever other party that they are having! Not cool! You don’t have to give me presents but don’t you think it’s kind of pathetic that this is the first time in four years that I’ve been in the area and you are all have BBQ’s and have not invited me?!?!

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This entry has been tagged: birthdays, challenge, nmht, work

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June 29, 2007

Grr! Not Right!

So I was bad and I didn’t stay late at work yesterday which means I have more things to enter today and I’ll probably have to stay late today. On top of all that I have to create a form that data can be entered on because the one that we have isn’t any good. So not cool!

My boss was really stressing me yesterday because he was asking for some data which hasn’t been updated in months and which he can pull himself. Also because of him the day before I couldn’t do any of the things that were actually the priority. Anyway I told him that there was no way we could get it done by Monday and there really isn’t. I could spend all weekend on it but I’m not going to.

For the rest of the day I was stressed and unfocused which I tried really hard to focus but I was not able to. Today I’m just not going to look at any of my e-mail unless it is from the director and I’m going to tell the receptionist that if she needs me to come set up for the desk for her she better send an e-mail because I’m not picking up my phone at all.

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This entry has been tagged: challenge, nmht, work

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June 28, 2007

Training and Calorie count from Day 3

So yesterday I had to go to a half day training session that took place in a different building than the one that I normally go to. I had to pay $7 for parking, of which I totally plan on getting my money back for. And I spent the first half the training bored out of my skull because it was all stuff that I wasn’t going to be able to do. The second half was great though and really informative. It is also going to help me get some new policies going which is something I love. I’m a rule-maker type, I love knowing the rules and following them. Does that make me a type A? I think so. Which I believe my mother is, so it would make totally sense.

My mom and I don’t get along for more than 3 days at a time. The reason, we are both very similar to each other. I have no problem admitting that I’m exactly like my mom. No problem at all, cause my mom is actually kind of awesome. I say kind of because she is my mom.

Anyway when I got back to work I had to do all kinds of things except for the ones that I actually needed to do. I might have to stay late tonight. I don’t know.

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This entry has been tagged: challenge, nmht, work

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June 27, 2007

Drink more water!

Hi Everyone! I know it's been forever since I made a real post but my life has been so uninteresting.

Yesterday though I decided that I need to start posting more often because well, I could tell that I was starting up again with my negative thinking.

I was in the car and while I was driving to work I saw a sign that said two left lanes closed ahead due to an accident. Of course my first thought was, omg I'm going to be late for work. Then panic set in. Then I started thinking about how the airbag in my car would kill me because I'm so short. And of course I obsessed about that. I thought about calling my mom (at 7 AM) to find out how I should put the steering wheel so that when the airbag pops out I don't get decapitated.

Thankfully I didn't call her at 7 AM. I tried to think about other things but this airbag thing really stuck with me, which is not normal for me. So I figure I need to start writing about things and work out why my brain is currently functioning the way it is.

Click the link to read more about what's going on.

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This entry has been tagged: challenge, nmht

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June 26, 2007

More Crosspost testing

So I found a version of MTLJTags and right now I'm going to see if it works

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Crosspost Testing

So I found out today that MTLJPost had a brand new version (well not totally new but it was new to me) and I'm trying it out

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April 1, 2007

The Challenge!

OMG! I can't believe it! So I just started cutting back my calories and working out last Thursday and already I've shed 4 lbs. and 1/2 an inch around my waist which is totally awesome! And added bonus a really good motivator to keep me going because honestly even if I just loose half a pound a day I'll be happy.

So in order to track my daily progress which is probably not a good idea, you really are only suppose to weigh in once a week but since I've decided to direct my OCD into this, I found this nifty little graph thing. And because it lets you blur your weight I'm putting it at the top of my main blog at DG.net and a link to it at my LJ because LJ doesn't like the coding for it. That way I can see what I've done! Woot! Let's just hope I actually keep this up. I really need to because I fear the next liver biopsy.

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This entry has been tagged: budapest, challenge, postsecret

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March 19, 2007

Grace Kelly by Mika

Can someone please tell me what the deal is with the little girl?

I like the song and all but I want to know what the deal is with that girl. It's so weird!

This entry has been tagged: music video

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March 18, 2007

March Madness

Wow! So I haven't posted in a while and you will totally not believe why! I was in Hungary. But before I could go the US government decided to make me jump through about a few dozen hoops, which was totally annoying because my legs, while be long for someone who is so short are still short! J/K

So if you dare be prepared for a major rant fest of how a US citizen has to go through h-e-double hockey sticks to get a passport, not so that they can leave the country, but so they can get back in!

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This entry has been tagged: budapest, passports, rants

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February 21, 2007

A few House icons

Instead of doing my work like I was suppose to do while my friend was at work this is what I did:

Teaser:

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This entry has been tagged: boston, icons, nmht

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February 17, 2007

Boston

So today beings day 1 in Boston. I'm here till Monday night. I woke up with a neck and back ache to an empty apartment save for Jen's cat Zoe. I totally <3 Jen for letting me stay here but really I have to figure out a better way to sleep on a futon that doesn't kill me before I go home.

What I'm suppose to be doing while Jen is at work trying to figure how to make her computer work with internet connection, which is impossible since my computer only works for like 5 minutes at a time. If I breath the wrong way the connection goes bye-bye! Something about this apartment, it's weird. But this is the first time that I've been able to long on for awhile so I figured I might as well.

I'm meeting tamalinn for dinner tonight which reminds me that I better hurry up and finish my report so that I can get myself over to the restaurant by 7:30pm.

So what is this report that I'm being forced to do? Well I was told to write down everything I do while I'm at work. So basically it's a weekly performance report that I haven't done since my boss left and was told to do while he is gone. It probably would have been easier to do this every day, or do it the next day, but I'm busy and I don't have time to think about things like this.

So now I'm stuck last minute doing this stupid thing. Fun, fun!

I'm gonna try to e-mail Jazzy again and see if she wants to hang out tomorrow! That is if my e-mail connect lasts that long. We'll see...

TTYL!

Laterz!

This entry has been tagged: boston, nmht, work

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February 3, 2007

Voice dial and Bluetooth – Do you really need both?

So yes I’m totally consumed with the idea of getting a new phone, and why shouldn’t I be when there are so many new cool ones out there. I’m a technophile, which should totally be obvious since I have a desktop, laptop, two TiVo’s, two DVD players, a point-and-shoot camera, a digital camera, and a Sidekick which does all internet things that my laptop and desktop do up to and including burning a mean hole in my non-existent wallet. Did I mention that Sidekick also has a camera function as well.

Now I could just keep the same phone, boring! Or I could switch plans or cell phone companies and not pay more than $100 for a new phone, but then what would that phone do? Just call people? OMG! What would I do with myself if my phone just dialed numbers?!?!

I’m not kidding what would I do with myself? I mean really, would I notice a difference? When I was living in Boston maybe because I wasn’t driving everywhere and could focus on walking and texting, talking, and IMing all at once, but now… I don’t know. That’s what my reasonable side says anyway.

My technophile side says, you are joking right?!? A phone that just dials, are you insanse, that’s so 1999. You need color, you need camera, you need e-mail because honestly you know you won’t check your e-mail unless it’s hand delivered to you, and you to be able to text people all the time any time.

Okay so maybe I don’t need those things but I want them, and I went them really badly. Did I mention that I also have a Video Ipod and I want a phone that plays music?!? Seriously, I want a phone that plays music, although to be totally honest I would trade the music feature for a Bluetooth capable phone, because hello more gadgets, that would do voice dial.

I don’t want a Razor, everyone has a Razor, plus I stand by what I say that Motorola is just trying to rip you off with those little metal teeth charges that they have.

So this is pretty much has what consumed me for the last few weeks and it’s starting to get worse too! My one year contract started on Feb 21st of last year so it should finish on the 20th, right? Well let’s just say the 21st to be on the safe side, because my last billing day is the 20th. That’s the one thing I do like about T-mobile, they never pro-rated my bill at the start, I hate when companies do that. Anyway that’s 19 days until my contract is up!?!

The big question Cingular, Verizon, or T-mobile, cause Nextel/Sprint is just not an option.

The other question is if your phone had Bluetooth but doesn’t have voice dial is it really a Bluetooth hands-free phone? To me hands-free means you can just say call (insert name) but I guess even then you have to press a button to let the phone know to expect the “call” command. Hmm… So is a phone every truly hands-free?

I also just have to add that it cost me $6.00 to wash my quilt and sheets, is that good or bad? Hmm…

TTYL!

Laterz!

This entry has been tagged: cellphones, nmht

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January 23, 2007

Ramble

So I just finished watching Batman Begins and I have to say that I really did not like it.

The movie is completely serious and while it seems to follow the classic beginning that the comic book series has it totally lacks any humor that pervious Batman Movies have had before. Other Batman movies have light humor in them, to help ease the tension when needed; this was all gloom and doom the whole time. Not what I was expecting, and while I respect the fact that the writer and director were staying true to the series I just could not bring myself to watch this movie. I ended up watching most of it through fast forwarding.

The State of the Union address is on tonight which means that after 9pm there will be no television to watch because all of the major networks are going to be airing. I'm horrified. I can tell you what the State of the Union is without having to watch some dim-witted Texan prattle on about concepts that are completely beyond his comprehension. We are stuck in a war were there never be a clear winner, only a loser, but if we pull out of said war well then we really will be killing thousands of people. A solution to this problem is beyond anyone's comprehension, of that I'm convinced. I do not need to watch people argue over what is best and what is not best because there is no best in this situation, there is only what we can do and what we can longer support.

I am a hippie. I want them to take all the money that they are spending on this war and use it for education instead. Education is the true foundation to our society and until we start acting like it matters and pay educational professionals the way that they should be paid and giving them the supplies that they need then things will not change. I honestly believe that. Education is powerful. People want to change, but they cannot do so unless the tools are provided to facilitate this change. How come in other countries in the world higher education, such as college, is free or close to it, but here it is considered a privilege that only a privileged few are allowed to get. It should not be a privilege, it should be a right.

This entry has been tagged: netflix, nmht

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January 18, 2007

Dilemma much?

So as the end of my cell phone contract draws near I am faced with the same dilemma that we discussed only a year ago. Do I stay with my current service or go fishing elsewhere?

I really love my Sidekick. I’ve loved everything about. Especially the fact that it doesn’t burn a whole in my pocket every month with the bill, it only cost about 67 dollars a month, and I get unlimited text, e-mail, IM, and internet. Plus 600 minutes, which I hardly ever go over.

I do miss my rollover minutes from Cingular and I would still like some type of blackberry, cause lets face it, the girl loves to conform.

Now T-mobile does have a few Blackberry plans. I think I’ll still have to go in and talk to someone about it though. I’m very confused about the whole thing. Sometimes they say unlimited web and e-mail and then sometimes they say unlimited web, email, and text, so which is it?

Verizon I thought was cheaper than Cingular but it turns out not so much, while neither company offers an unlimited text option.

Cingular offers 3000 text for $19.99 but then I would still have to pay for the Blackberry service but there is no mention of internet. Plus I know if I get a blackberry I will check my work e-mail all the time. Not because I want to or anything just because I can. Which I so don’t need to do! So I guess the Blackberry is out but I still want it cause I really don’t think I can afford the BlackJack.

Cingular Blackberry Price Dreakdown:

Voice: $34.99 for 450 rollover minutes (I miss those)
Blackbery Unlimited: $44.99 (which I think includes text messaging, why is it more than the voice plan?!?)

Grand total per month before tax: $84.98

Cingluar BlackJack Price Breakdown:

Voice: $34.99 for 450 rollover minutes
PDA Connect Unlimited: $39.99 (no mention of text messages, again why more than the phone plan?)
3000 texts: $19.99

Grand total per month before tax: $99.97

Verizon Blackberry Price Breakdown:

Voice & Data Choice Bundle 450 minutes: $79.99
Unlimited IN Messaging PLUS 1000 additional messages: $15.00

Grand total per month before tax: $94.99

Verizon enV Price Breakdown:

Voice: $34.99 for 450 minutes
Text: $15.00 for 1000 texts (Jen and I send at least 50 on OTH night and this also has to include any from IM clients like Yahoo, MSN, AIM, which I’ve no idea how many I use)
Vcast: $15.00 (this has the Mobile web, which I guess means I can only check mobile webmail email access)

Grand total per month before tax: $69.99

T-mobile Sidekick 3 Price Breakdown:

Voice: $39.99 for 600 minutes
Data: $20.00 (unlimited web, email, text, IM)

Grand total per month before tax: $59.99

T-mobile Blackberry Price Breakdown:

Voice: $39.99
Data: $19.99 ( I don’t think it includes texts)
Texts: $14.99 (unlimted)

Grand total per month before tax: $74.47

I could pay just $59.99 but that only gives me 1000 minutes per month and this would be my main phone. I want to find out if the unlimited add-on for Blackberry includes texts but I don’t think so because it didn’t have different price breakdowns.

I really want a blackberry but I really don’t, it’s the whole work e-mail thing. I know me, I’ll check it because I can not because I need to or anything like that. Grr!

TTYL!

Laterz!

This entry has been tagged: cellphones, nmht

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January 5, 2007

Jan 2007

Astrology-Online.com says:

Channel your energy into projects that will enhance your home. Organize your day to avoid any setbacks that might ignite temper flare-ups. You can't live your life for others. You'll communicate easily and develop new friendships.

Your luckiest events this month will occur on a Thursday.

---

The reason this is so cool. I just read this today and last weekend during Gerald Ford Died Day (that's not what is really called but because I'm a contractor I was forced to take the day off without pay) I was at Wal-Mart and I bought the prettiest Day-Runner! Of course I'm mostly using it too keep track of when new episodes of my favorite TV shows are on, but it's a start! Yeah, I have TiVo, but it doesn't help when I forget to check and see what TV has collected for the week. I like to know what I should look for ahead of time. :D

TTYL!

Laterz!

This entry has been tagged: nmht

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December 9, 2006

Haven't you people ever heard of...

I talked to Jen tonight, she was drunk which is totally understandable given the situation that the wonderful VS has put her in. Rob went to another store in Brooklyn so now her store has no manager. Anyway I managed to get out of her that Lawyer Friend Jay was all proud of the advice that he gave me about not speaking to the PI. Okay, that’s not actually what happened, but he said that he told me not to talk to the PI and Jen said that sounded like a good idea and he said it was.

I’m trying to plan my next trip to Boston. I’m so taking a plane this time. The only question is when will I go? I’ll end up staying with Jen because well it’s Jen and she won’t turn me out, plus she lives closest to the airport. Well at least I know where I’ll stay.

Hey it’s almost Sunday, almost time for a new set of PostSecret. Yay!

TTYL!

Laterz!

Random thought/question: If over IM (whether it be via AOL, MSN, Yahoo, or just phone texting) someone tells you that they “luv” you without stating a reason why, such as I luv for remembering that, or something silly that friends say to each, they just say “I luv you”, does that actually mean anything?

PS: I still haven't done any cleaning.

This entry has been tagged: nmht

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Of Cellphones and Holidays

So I am faced with a major dilemma here. My cell phone contract is up at the end of February because T-mobile wanted to get rid of all the Sidekick II before the Sidekick 3 came out and was giving them away free if you signed a one year contract.

Here is my dilemma, which by the way when you look the word dilemma up in the MS Word Thesaurus one of the other words it gives you is "catch-22" so I have to wonder is "catch-22" in Webster's? Anyway my dilemma is I love my Sidekick, sure it could be smaller but then I would never find it and it would have probably broken by now because I'm forever dropping the thing, it's very sturdy. The other thing is that its charge doesn't use one of those charging things that has little metal teeth on the end of it, it's a sold charger. Those little metal teeth can bend and then you don't get a good charge from them anymore. Which is the biggest downfall, or at least so I've read, about Motorola phones because their chargers are just too delicate.

So there is one of three things that I could do:

- Keep my current cell phone and my current plan and wait.


- I can renew my plan with T-mobile and shell out big money for the Sidekick 3


- Port my number to another plan and not shell out big money for a new phone that will have either the same features such as unlimited texting, internet, and instant messenger, for way more money, or choose not to have those features. The one I think that I'll miss the most is the unlimited instant messaging and texting. If I did go to another service it would either have to be Cingular or Verizon. I like Cingular because of the rollover but Verizon encompasses the majority of the people that I talk to right now.

So the question is what should I do? I really will miss my Sidekick and I do like the fact that the internet is there when I need it because hello, I don't ever have to call 411 to get a number, but I don't really need it.

The reason I'm thinking about this now is that if I do decided to go with the Sidekick 3 I will need to start saving money like now!

Wow this whole thing is kind of shallow, yes. However tomorrow I'm going to Barnes & Nobel and using my gift cards to buy my mother and brother's gift. I'll have to buy my dad's gift when I don't have just $8 a day to spend. But I get paid on the 22nd and they live right next to Lowes Hardware. The reason I don't mind using my gift cards to buy a gift. Honestly, I love to read and when I was living in Boston I still had my MD license so I couldn't get a library card, which in turn lead to my family getting me gift cards to the book store. But I would use them so sparingly and would put myself in such a state over which book I should buy because what if something else comes along that I would just leave the store. So I rather spend the money on the gift card on something that I know I should be getting instead of searching for something.

Anyway one of the things that my brother wants is the new PostSecret book. I finally went the website today and this was the postcard I liked the most:

As long as my mother doesn't get the book for him tonight I'll probably get him it tomorrow. I think I should be allowed to get it though, after all I was the one who called him and told him to update his list.

Don't you just love the holidays?

TTYL!

Laterz!

PS: Please note that I should have been cleaning my apartment today, sigh... But I started bleeding out of every pore of my body so I decided against it.

This entry has been tagged: cellphones, nmht, postsecret

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November 30, 2006

Random

Hey All! So the weirdest thing happened right? First of all I'm having an affair, again. Just kidding, I'm not married or going out with anyone so not possible. Anyway a private investigator started calling for me. Do not ask me how she got my number because about a month after I moved from Boston I changed it. Oh that reminds me I really should take down CityCam.

Okay so the PI is calling about the robbery right? I don't remember all that much about it. Anyway I called her back but didn't leave her any details. Then I e-mailed Lawyer friend Jay and he said that they were probably just trying to help the defendant. So when she called again I chose not to call her back.

Anyway after her call it put me in edge for awhile. I didn't like it. I hate the way the robbery made me feel. I mean I'll freely admit I'm an equally opportunity bigot. I don't like people in general, I mean honestly who does. But I hate how the robbery made me ridiculously wary of Black people. Yeah, the guy who held me and the other Shoppe girl up was Black. Anyway all that came up again. It wasn't with all Black people this time though, which is good since I work with Black people, btw, they told me that's what I should call them, Black not African-American.

If it makes you feel better I don't like Latinos either, and I'm Latina. Of course that could be because I don't like the way that they are getting all, oh we don't have to learn English, we should all learn Spanish. Piffle! I speak both Spanish and English but I refuse to speak Spanish if it is going to enable someone not to learn the language of the country that they are coming to in order to get away from the hardships that their country put them through. If you are coming here for opportunities then show some respect and learn some English. Sure, fine, speak Spanish all you want at home, but if you are going to do business and get a job in the American work force than learn some English!

Thus ends my random rant.

Anyway everything else is going great. I really honestly am not having an affair! I'm still not talking to Peter. But I text'ed him Happy Thanksgiving, and he text'ed back so that's something right? God, I'm such an idiot. Never, ever sleep with your friends, especially your virgin friends!

:(

TTYL!

Laterz!

This entry has been tagged: nmht

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November 19, 2006

From Under My Rock

(looks at last entry date and wonders if it really has been that long)

Wow! Anyway if you are wondering I am alive. I’ve just been super busy. I started a new job on Oct. 2nd and had given my two weeks to Vitamin Shoppe about a week and a half before that. Of course I told them that I would stay on until they didn’t need me anymore since there still wasn’t enough management staff, but I said that I was going to have to cut back my hours. Fine, whatever. Anyway two weeks after I started my new job I was feeling really sick, mostly because of an EC that I had to talk, don’t worry we’ll come back to that. Anyway, I had to go to my new job, and we’ll get back to that too, because well I don’t have any sick days. So I called the Shoppe at two in the afternoon when my shift started at 6 pm and told them that I wouldn’t be able to come in. The District Manager, who we’ll call jackass, came on the phone and started yelling at me and telling me how he was bending over backwards to work with me since I cut my hours, blah, blah, blah. I told him I wasn’t coming in, he said fine but we were going to sit down and have a serious talk the next time I came in to work. This was on a Tuesday. The next day went and turned in my key and told the person who was there acting as a manager that it seems like I am no longer needed so here is my key. The guy told me that I shouldn’t leave, that he heard the DM yelling at me and the DM was in the wrong. I said it just wasn’t worth it to me and then left. No more Vitamin Shoppe! The best part, I was schedule to work the double on Saturday and Sunday, I’m not sure who the found to cover for me but I bet they were pissed.

Okay now onto my new job. I am working as a receptionist at the Health and Human Services training center in Rockville. I like my job, it’s not fun, but it keeps me busy and it’s only Monday through Friday. Also, big plus, I got a promotion. It’s not official yet because they have to find someone to replace me but yay! I’ll be a contract administrator, and no I have no idea what that means, nor do I have actually training to do this but my boss says that he is willing to work with me to get me trained, so yay!

Let "From Under My Rock" disturb you more...

This entry has been tagged: nmht

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September 17, 2006

Kings Dominion

So why do I always go to amusement parks but I never ride any rides? I'm not sure, I think I'm a masochist or something.

Anyway I went to Kings Dominion with my friend Sue, her boyfriend, and her brother. Sue is like me and doesn't ride any roller coasters so instead we walked around, yay calorie burning, ate funnel cake, oh bad calories, and played arcade games, oops there goes all our money.

Guess what! I won stuff!

Here are my winnings:

Won for Sue b/c her boyfriend is bad!

I kept these. If you get a Sponge Bob Square pants postcard from me blame Sue. It was her idea to use the rest of the tickets on them. :-D

Anyway I had a great time. Everyone always wonders why I have fun amusement parks so much when I don’t ride any of the rides, well I guess it’s because I like my friends to have fun. Plus goodies! Yay!

This entry has been tagged: nmht

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September 16, 2006

What the heck?

So people suck, and here is why:

Should LJ have copyright-like rights over your fanfics?

Read it and go fill out the form. If I can do it you can too! My artwork is mine... and the person who took the pictures, and the actors, and the... well you get the idea!

Grr!

This entry has been tagged: bad world

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September 15, 2006

Interview! Score!

So I called this woman back who had e-mailed and called me and she wanted me to come in this afternoon for an interview! However stupid VS I have to go to work. So I have an interview Monday at 9:30 and the job is in Rockville. I love the county! Okay I don't love the county because it costs too damn much to live in the county but oh well.

Anyway yay! Interview. Also I told her my min. salary which is about 50 cents more than what I was earning in Boston and she still wanted me to come in. I wish could earn more though. Apperantly I don't earn enough to live in the county and not qualify for Section 8. Not sure how I feel about that.

Oh well!

This entry has been tagged: interviews, jobs

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Grr! Argh!

I'm so tired. I couldn't really sleep last night. I don't know why. Cold Meds are suppose to make you sleepy. I felt sleepy but then I kept waking up like every three hours.

For right now my head feels okay and I can breath. My throat is a bit dry but I can deal with that.

I got an e-mail from the director of the grant that I wanted to work for. She still wants to give me the job but she says it has changed and she doesn't know if I'll be as interested. If it means less time in the field then I'll totally still be interested. The thing is can I really work 55 hours a week?

I want this job really badly but I need health insurance and she doesn't think that it will become full time.

I'm suppose to meet with my DM today and he is going to offer me a temp. assistant manager position. Temp because my ex-boss fucked me over because he is an asshole. I really shouldn't expect any less because honestly how can you go "Oh she is actually a really good worker I just was making shit up to get her to quit or get her fired." Yeah you can't really.

This entry has been tagged: cold meds, jobs, work

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September 14, 2006

Testing Crosspost

So I'm hoping this will be the last test that I have to do with Crosspost. I'm hoping that after this I will be able to post to my LJ without actually having to post to my LJ. I know that doesn't make much sense but right now I really don't care because I've been working on this all day and I'm happy to be done with it

Let "Testing Crosspost" disturb you more...

This entry has been tagged: cold meds

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September 10, 2006

MT Upgrade

So MT decided to do another upgrade. So uploaded it went. It's very odd because I didn't have to go through the whole MT upgrade process but apperently my upgrade was successful. Woohoo!

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August 26, 2006

I moved!

I’m moved. I’m not done unpacking, but I felt like I should post something. I finally got the internet back so yay! Right now I’m just bumming around reading House FF and being astounded that there are some mpreg House fics. WTF! That’s all I have to say about that.

The first time I saw it I thought it was an mpeg in a fan fiction I was like, oh link to video woohoo! Then I quickly realized that my dyslexia had gotten the better of me. The idea of House, Chase, Foreman, or Wilson carrying a child is just plan scary. Hell the idea of any man carrying a child that is not in Sim 2 world is scary. And I defer to the movie Junior as proof. I bet they had fun while they made it though. Not the point though. Mpreg, can we ban it? Please? At least in fan fiction.

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August 6, 2006

Feeling dead...

So I really wanted to do some more House Sims today but I couldn’t. Why, because my dad found this really great job that I WANT!!! It’s as a Traveler Trainer working for a Non-Profit in MD. So I worked on my cover letter and my mom is going to read it later and send it back to me so I can send it out tomorrow.

I really want the job! :-( I hope I get it, or at least an interview.

In other news I unpacked a dresser and a bookcase last night. By unpack I mean that emptied them went through everything, threw out what I didn’t want, and packed what I did. I have two weeks, that’s it! I’m so dead!

TTYL!

Laterz!

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August 3, 2006

Nothing! Absolutely nothing!

So I have done nothing in the way of packing. I spent sometime thinking about packing, talking about packing. talking about cleaning, but not doing anything. Instead I spent my day cleaning up my Sims 2 game. I now have some Sims that I'm actually proud of. Of course before I share I must warn all of you that, yes I'm prone to use cheats and because of this my Sims tend to be boring.

So here we go!

Let "Nothing! Absolutely nothing!" disturb you more...

This entry has been tagged: house m.d. sims, sims

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Emotion Icons

So I was looking up was to cross post between MT and LJ because MTLJPost doesn't want to work for some unknown reason and I'm not about to downgrade or take everything off the server and re-upload. Anyway I found something that might let me use emotion icons! Woohoo!

Well now we are testing that theory...

Let "Emotion Icons" disturb you more...

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MT Upgrade

I upgraded MT! WOOHOO! I'm excited because as soon as I get a chance I'm going to start using tags! I like tags. I think they are cool. I'm not really sure how to use them with the skins because tags use cgi and not php but I'm researching

In other news I managed to get Annabelle's site back online: http://artistic.ensanity.us go check it out!

TTYL!

Laterz!

Laney broke down at 2:00 AM | (0) were disturbed

July 25, 2006

1342 JUNK trackbacks!

Okay seriously there has got to be something better for people to do other than spam my little blog which I hardly ever update? I mean really, don't you people have a life?

Anyway if you are wondering what has happened to me the answer is really simple. I'm moving back to MD in a few weeks and I'm freaking out big time because I still don't have a job. They are trying to transfer me at the VS but the chances of that going through and me keeping my salary are nill so I have to find another job soon!

Sigh. Sorry don't have time to write more. But now I have to force myself to go to sleep so that I can get up tomorrow morning and go work with a boss that hates me. Woohoo!

TTYL!

Laterz!

Laney broke down at 10:36 PM | (0) were disturbed

June 19, 2006

The End Is Nigh!

Okay not really but it’s so fucking hot! What the hell is up with this weather! I don’t care what Fush says (that typo was on purpose btw) Global Warming does exist and it is man made! Not that I’m doing anything to help because I just bought a second small AC for my apartment. I had to. The Grand Room (meaning my living/dining/kitchen) was so hot last year because I left the AC in the bedroom. But this year both rooms will be cool.

So I picked up the new AC unit yesterday and got some nice man to carry it up the four flights of stairs for me. I love the restaurant workers that live in my building. I did give a small tip, well tried to. He didn’t take it. I should have offered more money to take the damn thing out of it’s box. I didn’t want to turn it over so that the all the stuff in the condenser would leek out so I pulled and pushed the damn thing out it’s box. Then I had to put it together. The fucking screws wouldn’t fit and I ended up managing to screw in the top rail which had the guides for the accordion things on the sides but I ended up having to duck tape those on because the screws they gave me weren’t long enough, well that and my screw driver sucks. I had a different one when I put my first AC together, I’m sure because that one I got together no problem. After all that I had to put duck tape around the whole unit once it was in the window because my window has very weird tracks around it. I knew I was going to have to do that because I had to do so last year with my unit in my bedroom. It’s not cause it will fall out of the window, it’s more because all this air was coming in and if I didn’t I would be wasting all the cool air!

It may be 95 degrees in my bathroom (I keep the bathroom door closed because the insulation around the sky light isn’t great) it’s a cool 75 in my apartment. Maybe a little warmer because I don’t want my electric bill to sky rocket.

Now I can browse online for more Sim clothes and Sim houses in comfort. Yea! I started to build one house and well I’m tired of it already. I want to rip it down and start over. Ugh! This is why I always use pre-built!

TTYL!

Laterz!

Let "The End Is Nigh!" disturb you more...

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June 12, 2006

Sadness

I am sad now… I get like this sometimes because well now I’m off all of my medication which I think is a good thing because I didn’t want to be on anti-depressants for the rest of my life, the thought of doing so just depresses me. Anyway I talked with my mom and tonight and I brought up some stuff from the past, an old fight because I wanted her to understand what happens in our family. I really don’t think she sees how much angst Jed causes for everyone. We love, we have to, he is good person when he wants to be, but he is also the biggest brat in the world and feels the need to tell everyone how to run their lives, or what they could be doing differently because what they are doing is not the right way, it’s wrong. He is like my mother but she has learned how to stop when we tell her that we are going to do it our way. There is a lot of her personality in his, more so than my father’s. I have the my father’s passiveness but my mother’s stubbornness combined with the need to her show her that she has to see all sides of any story, which is basically telling her how to view things I know, but I get that from her too.

I don’t know if it’s easier for me to view what goes on in my family from a third party perspective because I feel like a third party a lot the time. I don’t feel attached to anyone in my family; I think I have the strongest attachment to my brother Todd. I don’t talk to him a lot, not as much as my mother, but I feel like we understand each other more. I talk to my mom a lot because I want her approval all the time. I want her to be proud of me and I need the constant reassurance that she is.

The whole thing makes me sad really. I think I’m just gonna go to bed now. I don’t feel good and there is a lump in my throat the size of a grapefruit, it hurts a lot.

Oh I had to give my Mei-Mei to my friend Brad today because well there is no place in Maryland that will let me move in with three cats. I miss her a lot. But she and Emmitt were always fighting and I really felt like it wasn't fair to them. I wish they got along because Johnson and I loved Mei-Mei lots. I'll probably add a few more pictures to the Mei-Mei cam before I take it down later this month.

TTYL!

Laterz!

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June 1, 2006

Cats are just weird

While I was getting this entry ready to post both Emmitt and Johnson decided to start munching on some CVS bags. I don't know why. Maybe they are hungry but I can't help the fact that everything in Boston is closed. They'll make it one night without food. Hell I'm shooting for three days! Anyway...

So most of my favorite shows have now ended but do not loose hope there is brand new TV for the summer:

The Joy of Cable brings us:

Starting TUESDAY May 30:
10:00-11:00 PM Rescue Me on FX

Starting SUNDAY June 11:
9:00-10:00 PM The 4400 on USA

Starting MONDAY June 12:
9:00-10:00 PM The Closer on TNT

Starting MONDAY June 12:
10:00-11:00 PM Saved on TNT

Starting SUNDAY June 18:
10:00-11:00 PM The Dead Zone on USA

Starting FRIDAY July 7:
9:00-10:00 PM Monk on USA

Starting FRIDAY July 7:
10:00-11:00 PM Psych on USA

Now with that in mind here is how fall is shaping up to be

Days and times that my TiVo will be set to NBC:

MONDAY
10-11 p.m. "Medium"

TUESDAY
9-10 p.m. "Law & Order: Criminal Intent"
10-11 p.m. "Law & Order: Special Victims Unit"

WEDNESDAY
10-11 p.m. "Law & Order"

THURSDAY
10-11 p.m. "ER"

NBC seems determined to make sure that I go out on the Weekends if I so choose to do so. I’m kind of mad about the fact that Law & Order: Criminal Intent is being put on Fridays I really wish they would just get rid of Chris Noth, well maybe not him but his partner, I just have an issue with her because she can’t seem to decided how she wants to play her character. Hopefully though it will get better ratings since it’s not opposite that Housewives show which I think is just really a cheap watered down rip off of Sex In The City.

Edited: I am now mad at NBC because now LOCI is up against House. The seem to want to kill this show. Why! I like LOCI! Damn you NBC, I want my soul back!

Crossing Jordan isn’t listed because it and Scrubs aren’t going to return until like Mid-Season, like Scrubs did this year. They will both return though, which is a damn good thing because Scrubs is like the only comedy that I watch.

Day and time that my TiVo will be set to CBS:

THURSDAY
9:00-10:00 PM CSI: CRIME SCENE INVESTIGATION

It’s the only other drama show that I watch on a network that isn’t NBC because NBC owns my soul. I hate NBC, I want my soul back!

Days and times that my TiVo will be set to the Brand New CW:

TUESDAY

8:00-9:00 PM GILMORE GIRLS

WEDNESDAY

9:00-10:00 PM ONE TREE HILL

Even though I’m so mad at the Gilmore Girls writers right now I’ll be watching it. I had thoughts about trying to watch the “ended” 7th Heaven but I’ve decided against it. What the FUCK WERE YOU THINKING CW!!!! You should have begged Joss Whedon for Firefly back! HOW THE FUCK DO YOU BRING BACK A SHOW THAT IS JUST EVIL!!! I swear 7th Heaven just won’t die! They should have brought back Charmed for crying out loud, anything but that!

Days and times that my TiVo will be set for FOX:

WEDNESDAY
8:00-9:00 PM BONES

SUNDAY
9:00-9:30 PM FAMILY GUY

On the plus side because NBC switched when LOCI was going to be on I can once again watch Family Guy, another scratch mark for my comedy section.

Well that’s it for now because I have to bed because well yeah it’s almost 2am. However I finally worked on my brother’s logo for his Brewing Co. that I said that I was going to work on ages and ages ago. I think it turned out pretty good. It’s not exactly like the drawing he made we will see. I hope he likes it. Granted I changed the colors a bit, I think, I forgot what he wanted.

Anyway I have to get up early and finish cleaning my apartment. I really want to throw out all of the food because I’m starting a two day fast, which might go to three days. My last bit of food was at 4:30pm May 31st . I’m hoping to make it till June 2nd. We will see. This is purely because my doctor told me to get rid some of my body fat so that I wouldn't have to get another liver biopsy. I blame him for my eating disorder that is starting to come on full fledged! Can I sue my liver doctor for giving me an eating disorder since he told me that if I lost 15 lbs or more that he wouldn’t have to another biopsy? I think I should be able to because now I’m hooked on Ephedra, which is legal again, and I’m trying to fast. Oh just so you all know Hoodia really does help! I’m totally suing this guy. I’ll have to ask my lawyer friend Jay about it tomorrow. Night!

TTYL!

Laterz!

Let "Cats are just weird" disturb you more...

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May 20, 2006

This Girl’s got readers…

So I just checked my e-mail and it said that I had a brand new comment that came from a person named Baron. While I was sad to find out that Baron’s spouse had been cheating on him for five years I was all excited because I found out that I had another reader. It gives me faith to actually keep writing this thing. I don’t know if I help anyone or if anyone can help me but at least some one is reading, right?

Anyway I was very upset to find out that to day is the last day that NBC will be showing Conviction. I was so hoping that they might pick up the show again for next season because it was such a good show, granted I was more interested in the couples than the actual court stuff but still, I liked it. I wish since NBC last week that they would have at least changed the advertising to let us know that tonight was the series finale.

I’ve decided that NBC is worse than Fox. Fox kept canceling shows that I liked, okay well they cancelled Firefly, and I haven’t watched that network since then. Last year NBC cancelled Medical Investigation (I can never remember if that show is suppose to have an “s” at the end of it or not maybe it would have been more successful if it did) and I really liked that show because the Duck Man (as Jen and I called him) really just scared me to no end. I know the show wasn’t suppose to be scary and he was suppose to be the protagonist but he was just scary looking and it was fun to actually be scared by something.

Now Conviction is gone. My heart is broken because I really liked this one almost couple on the show and they finally kind of got together, well the guy fessed up and told the girl he was in love with her. But we never found out if they were gonna run of and get married and have lots of lawyer babies and I wanted to know damnit! So that’s just that. Sigh!

So once again when the Primetime Fall 2006 schedule rolls out I will have nothing to watch. Granted I probably shouldn’t want to be home on a Friday night but since I have nothing better to do I would at least like something on TV to distract me from the fact I have nothing better to do with my life than sit at home on a Friday night and watch TV. Geez NBC! You really aren’t helping my self esteem!

Okay it’s 2am almost now and I told my friend Elizabeth that I was going to bed awhile ago. I stayed up and watched ER but now I’m starting to fall asleep typing which is never good and leads to me not finishing my thoughts when I type and well the more likelihood of a cat running across the keyboard and posting my entry before I’m done writing it so I’m going to sign off now and go to bed.

TTYL!

Laterz!

PS – If you are trying to post a comment without being signed onto TypeKey your comment won’t show up until I approve it. It’s to prevent spamming. Sorry! But please do comment! I love feedback!

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May 7, 2006

The Ways of The World

So I haven’t been doing much lately. Just work, sleep, trying to not to eat, work, sleep, well you get the idea. There really hasn’t been much to write about because while work is just as hellish as ever there really haven’t been any crazy stupid customers coming in. There have been crazy customers and stupid ones even some rude ones too but nothing really extraordinary that warrants being written about.

I’m going on vacation next week with my friend Sue. We are going to Las Vegas and that should be pretty exciting. I hope anyway. LOL. I rented the car last night. I forgot why but for some reason they asked what kind of credit card I was going to be using. Then they didn’t even ask for the number. Very weird huh? They also said that if I wanted to fill in my driver’s license number ahead of time to save time later that I could. I opted not to. You never know what people can do with this stuff right?

One of my friends back from when I watched Angel, back when it was still on TV, told me about a convention that is going on in Florida this July that I would really like to go to. But I’m not sure if I will. I would like to because I think it might be fun but at the same time it’s in Florida, in July, and I need to be saving money for my move because that’s going to be a huge expense.

My move, well… Yeah I still don’t know where I’m going to move to. I talked with my mom last night which was good because I was worried that she and my dad got it into their heads that I would for sure be moving into Maryland. Hell she even said, I’m so excited that you are moving back. But I’m not sure if she really realized it yet. She and I were talking about it and basically it comes down to where I want to be for the next 5 or so years in order to finish up my social work degree, which school has the best program, and if I go to school up here will I still be able to get my LCSW in Maryland.

Part of me really really wants to move. I feel like if I don’t move I’ll regret it. I kind of did last year when I said was going to move. I mean there really is no reason for me to stay. I don’t have a boyfriend, I have a job I hate, and well it costs a ton of money. However, it does cost more to live in DC, can you believe that? Well technically it costs more to live in Maryland in the area that I want to live in. I thought Boston was like the third most expensive city to live in, the first two being New York and Los Angeles, I guess I was wrong.

I would like to move to Los Angeles though, or Santa Fe, but they do not allow ferrets in the state of California, what the hell is up with that! I mean seriously, I know that ferrets aren’t exactly the most domestic looking things but they are cute damn it, and I love Morty! I refuse to move anywhere that won’t let me have my Morty with me! Grr!

Yeah sorry, I got side tracked when I was making sure that I spelled Los Angeles right. I might not have every written this before but I am a horrible speller. I would do good in my grade 3 and grade 4 spelling bees but that’s just because I memorized the vocabulary list. Other than that I’m awful. I remember one time I was doing one of those standardized tests that they make you take around grade 6 and it was the writing portion, I was doing okay but for some reason I got stuck because I forgot how to spell step! A freaking four letter word! I left it blank spot of it and then went back when my brain resumed functioning.

Anyway that’s it for now. Hope that was as fun for you as it was for me *wink*

TTYL!

Latez!

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April 8, 2006

Going to Florida!

Woohoo! I get to leave in a few short days for Florida to see my little niece Anna Sophia who was born on February 27th. So cool! I’m really excited. I even have a brand new suit case too, so hopefully for a trip that is only gonna be about four days I’ll only have to take 2 bags. I’m such a bad packer I swear. Normally no matter were I go I have at least three bags with me. I don’t know how I do it, I swear, but it always happens!

The only thing about this trip is I have so much to do before it happens. I was so lazy today cause I was going to hang out with Jen but didn’t turn out that way and now I have nothing done. I have to do some laundry tomorrow, I have to pack, I have to go to Porter Square for about an hour, trust me you don’t want to know, then I have to get cat food and litter, which is going to be two different trips because there is no way I can make it one. Unless I take a cab, but still. Ugh, way too much to do!

On the plus side I finally finished the Brenda Leigh Johnson fanlisting! I’m so proud of it. Please check it out! The layout to forever to come up with. Then I had to recolor the pictures. It doesn’t look like a lot of work went into it because there are fewer pictures than I wanted but I was going to have eight, it started to look to crowded after about four though. Here’s the link: http://brenda.ensanity.us

Well that’s it for now. I really should go to bed!

TTYL!

Laterz!

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March 26, 2006

Bored on a Sunday!

So Emmitt was sick a few weeks ago. I don't remember if I posted about it or not but he was very sick and I was worried that I might have to put him down. So I called my aunt and asked her to please take him and me to the vet. I haven't really asked her for much of anything since we had our falling out a few years ago. If I posted about it somewhere I'll link to it later. Anyway to say thank you I told her I would buy her breakfast today. She picked me up at 1pm and now two hours later I haven't eaten yet because she is working with someone on this documentary short that has been her life for the las serveral years. I don't mind really but we could have gotten together next weekend. Oh well!

I've been doing my laundry and thinking about the Brenda Leigh Johnson fanlisting which I've been the go ahead to run. She is the lead character from the TNT show The Closer. I'm really exicited about it.

Oh she is finishing up now. Time to go!

TTYL!

Laterz!

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March 20, 2006

Forever and a day

I know it's been awhile since I've posted but I have my reasons.

The first is that I've been a horrid mood for a long time. I'm just not myself. Do you ever get that feeling that you are just sleep walking through your own life? That's what I feel like right now. I feel like everything is just out of my control. It kind of sucks but I am starting to go back to normal again so yay!

Now the other reason is that I'm having major decision making aniexty. I want to leave my job but the problem is any new job I start I'll feel like I have to stay there at least a year which isn't good since I'm thinking of moving back to Maryland this year.

For real this time too. This isn't like last year where I chickened out in the end. I just don't like being here and I feel like there is nothing for me up here.

But enough with the life altering questions for now. We come to the point in this entry where we have the dumbist quotes from the VS:

(The phone rings)
Me: Hello, thank you for calling the Vitamin Shoppe how can I help you?

Person: Is this Paul's tubing store?

***

Yeah, I was amused by that. Then Mr. Strive Bar came in and I had him try some of our new hand anti-bacterial gel. I told him it smelled like Skin-so-Soft. And he said it might be too fem for him. I thought, this coming from the men who I thought for sure was guy until I saw the wedding band which still isn't saying much.

Oh well! TTYL!

Laterz!

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February 22, 2006

The Sidekick II

So my Cingular contract finally was up and I had to choose between T-mobile and Verizon. It was a hard choice because my whole family is on Verizon but I decided to go with T-mobile because in the end it was cheaper and I really wanted the Sidekick. Plus my contract with T-mobile is only for a year so if I hate it I only have to stay with it for a year. Woohoo!

Speaking of woohoo, part of the reason I haven't been posting is that I have become addicated to The Sims 2!!! I love that game.

Let "The Sidekick II" disturb you more...

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February 5, 2006

Just a little note to myself

So this is a webpage by someone else but on it is the best X-files fanfiction ever created. I'm linking it because well I need to find it again to e-mail the author's and let them know that their first two books aren't up anymore. Sigh!

The Magician

Nothing much else going on except that my neighbor is having loud sex, I feel bad for her though cause she must be faking it for the guy. He lasts about two minutes before there is no sound again. I'm thinking he just can't keep it up for that long. Oh well, her problem, not mine.

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January 28, 2006

The results are in...

Okay so I’m really really bored today. Jen and I are suppose to go out tonight to the movies with her friend but she doesn’t get off work till around 4pm so I don’t have anything to do. I am being such a lump. I really should look up the calorie count in movie popcorn and find out how much alcohol I can consume tonight but I’m being so lazy. I think my J-cat is trying to stare me down to give him some fresh water, but why bother when he’ll just drink out of the toilet anyway?

Anyway I was online reading some blogs and I found one entry about this game that someone had played with their friends, MASH, you know Mansion, Apartment, Shack, House? Well I was looking at the paper they had scanned in and was like, hey I remember this game, vaguely, but I remember it. So I went online to see if there was anything about. There are two sites set up for you to play MASH online. The one I thought was the cutest was this one: http://www.playmash.com/

Here are the results that I got:

You will live in Shack.
You will drive a Green Accord.
You will marry Vincent D'Onofrio and have 4 kids.
You will be a Singer in Venice, Italy.

I am hoping that 2 of those 4 kids are from his previous marriages. Eeeps! Being in a shack with 4 kids and a 6ft 3in man is gonna get crowded if our families ever come to visit, which they will because well be in Venice, Italy! Woohoo!

Well I got to go practice my singing. If I hope to support 4 kids I better get really good really quickly because I can’t carry a tune to save my life!

TTYL!

Laterz!

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January 22, 2006

Ugh! Stupid KnowFat!

I'm so mad! I went to KnowFat! with Jen before the movie and I got this Broccoli and Steak Tip wrap because I still had 488 calories left for the day. Well I just found out that the wrap has 555 calories. My goal today was 1300 calories so I went over it by 67 calories which isn't so bad because I have a grand total of 1367 and my friend Jasmine who is going to be a nutritionist kind was mad at me because she said that I should really be eating more than 1500 calories. So I figure going over 67 isn't so bad. I'll just have to be more careful that's all.

I was really healthy today though. I had two EAS Body for Life shakes one Vanilla and one Strawberry which were 190 calories each and another Chicken BLT salad which I was really proud that I got since I've been craving Chicken nuggets.

Tomorrow I have to go into the Vitamin Shoppe though because I left my pill case there tonight and I have to go get it so that I can get my Anaprox and various other drugs. I also bought a mini-pill case for short over night trips so that I don't have to take my Effexor with me all the time. I worry about losing that one because it's the more expensive of all my meds. Maybe I'll buy some Hoodia too because I really would like to eat less. Jen doesn't think that Hoodia will really help because I'm taking Redline and since that is making me burn calories faster of course I'm gonna get hungry faster and more often. Makes sense but I'd rather try it than not. I liked TrimSpa cause I felt like it was making me eat less. I stopped taking it because I don't like the new packaging, it causes the pills to brake and swallowing a broken tablet is no fun.

Well time for bed...

In case you were wondering my mom hasn't e-mailed me back. I'm worried now that I was too harsh. She hasn't called either. I'm going to call my Aunt tomorrow because she read the e-mail too.

TTYL!

Laterz!

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January 21, 2006

email to mom

So I wrote an e-mail to my mother last night and I cried for most of the time I wrote it. It was hard to put my feelings in writing. I don’t think I got it quite right but I really tried. I woke up this morning and started my period. So now I’m shaking because I don’t want to know what my mother is going to do when she reads the e-mail and because well I have my period and it always makes me really sick. Yay fun!

I’m suppose to go to a movie tonight with Jen and Jasmine. So I’m making this post now. I am posting the e-mail so that you can see it and maybe tell me what you think. Please click below to read the e-mail…

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January 20, 2006

To eat or not to eat, well really what do you eat?

Hi everyone! So I have started a new diet plan. Basically I am way over my BMI and while it doesn’t bother me too much, because I like my general body shape and having boobs, I must listen to what my doctor is telling me and lose weight because if I don’t do what he says they might be able to deny me a liver transplant down the line if I need one. Not fair!

Anyway basically I have decided to only eat 1350 calories a day. I am not exercising which I know isn’t great but I spend all day on my feet and walking around the store, plus I do walk almost everywhere. Plus when I was on e-diets before they just had me count calories and didn’t worry about exercise, I thought that was weird but oh well. I’m going to try to do some muscle toning every now and then because I don’t want to have skin just hanging off of me when I’m done.

So here is how yesterday went:

I had a total of 1286 calories for the day which was just shy of my goal. I was kind of worried about it because you are suppose to eat at least 1200 and that’s just for basic maintenance and I read that my body actually needs about 2000 calories just to run so I didn’t think that was very good but oh well, I wasn’t about to go over because I only had 64 more calories left. What was I suppose to do?

Today so far I’ve only had 1076 calories which leaves me with 274 calories. I really have to start eating better. The problem is that I choose to eat unhealthy food during the day which leaves me with an odd amount of calories so that I don’t really have enough to eat what I would like to at night and just end up drinking a lot of water so that I don’t feel hungry.

I don’t feel like developing an eating disorder but I really can see myself getting one. I think tomorrow after work I’ll have to try to go to Shaw’s and start buying some frozen meals. It’s the best way besides drinking protein shakes for me to count calories. I get so paranoid that what I eat will have more calories than I think it will that tend not to.

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December 31, 2005

Happy Holidays!!!!

Yeah right, when are the holidays ever really happy? Well I’m not speaking with my mom, again, maybe for sometime now too. The night before I left everyone was talking about what they were going to do with my laptop the next day. I finally was like, I’m packing my laptop tonight. My brother yelled: “You can’t pack your laptop tonight!”

Me: It’s my laptop!

Then a whole fight ensued. Which ended with me crying!?! My other brother Todd (he is the one who I like) ended up having to seat up with me for another hour so that I would stop crying and was able to finish cleaning up. I packed everything up that night.

Let "Happy Holidays!!!!" disturb you more...

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December 24, 2005

Home again, home again...

So I’m home now. I still have my head cold that I’ve had since last week. I don’t feel like it’s getting any better but my ears didn’t clog up completely like they did a couple of years ago when I flew home for thanksgiving, so that’s a plus. I e-mailed all my MD contacts last night to let them know that I am here now. I spent most of the day sleeping because I had no sleep the previous night and I figure the more rest I get the quicker I can get rid of this cold.

Right now there isn’t much going on here. There never is though. I woke up at 6am and then went back to sleep for a bit. Then my brother and his wife started to wake up and move around so I woke up and took a shower after they were all done. Now I’m doing laundry. I figure by the time my laundry is done I can go out and try to do some X-mas shopping. I have all my gifts for my family but I need some for my friends here. Nothing big, just small little things so they know I care. Maybe I’ll go to Michael’s and buy some little candles and what not. I was reading US Weekly and in the back of the magazine they had little gift ideas, but none of them were under $40. It shocked me because I don’t even spend $40 on my family. X-mas gifts should have a $20 limit when you are as broke as me. My parents are allowed to spend more because well they aren’t broke. They usually do but I didn’t ask for anything big this year so…. Oh I did ask for a new memory stick for my digital camera, but I just asked for it last night. Maybe Daddy and Jed will go out and get it. I doubt it though, probably not till after X-mas, none of us like the crowds at the malls and what not.

Let "Home again, home again..." disturb you more...

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December 17, 2005

Awake at this awful hour...

So some cat decided that at 1am they were going to run their water bowl into my bedroom door thus waking me out of a sound sleep. I suspect Mei-Mei because she is the only one who I couldn’t find right away when I went outside my bedroom to see what had happened.

I went through and added all of my MovableType entries to my LiveJournal and then I went through and friend set all of the entries. I think now it’s going to be set up at LiveJournal so only my friends can view the entries which I know is weird but I can’t put my disclaimer like I have on this site on every entry there so I figured it’s the best way to keep a small child from running across something they shouldn’t.

So by doing all that I feel like my time awake had been really productive and I thought that I should post another entry to both blogs.

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December 16, 2005

Quick rundown....

So here is what's going to be happening over the next few days. I'm going to be running around like a mad woman to get the last few gifts that I need to pick up, I have to call airtrain and find my flight info because I lost it, try to get in touch with my aunt because I have to give her a gift, which is one of the ones that I have yet to buy, try to hunt down the template my brother gave me of his logo, I knew I should have scanned it in the minute I got home.

So yeah there is a lot and I have this horrible feeling that Mei-Mei might have chewed on my brother's template which is so not good.

Anyway I have got to get to work. I'm really just writing this to test crossposting between here and my livejournal. We will see how it goes.

Laterz!

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November 14, 2005

Introducing the Mei Mei Cam

Hi everyone! So about four months ago I got another cat. Yeah I know. Another one. What can I say? I'm a Cancer and since I can't have a human family I need to have a animal family. Meet Mei Mei, which is Mandarin for little sister. I learned that from Firefly. She is the cutest little thing and is probably about a fourth the size of my other monster cats. Emmitt is not very fond of Mei Mei but Johnson loves her. His only problem with her is that she is a little too active for him. Other than that everything else is cool between them. Morty thinks she is the coolest because she actually tries to play with him. She gets scared sometimes though which is really funny.

Other than that not much going on here. Carle called me and told me that if I didn't update my blog and log online a few times then I was going to have to fly to Texas so I chose the updating. I barely have enough money to go home for X-mas! Actually it's kind of funny. I don't have any money to go home for Thanksgiving. I'm staying here. But Jen's sister is hopefully going to come up and visit and that should be a fun time.

Let "Introducing the Mei Mei Cam" disturb you more...

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November 6, 2005

Food!!!!

I'm so hungry right now! This really sucks. I can't believe I have to get up this early in the morning and I can't eat. I blame my aunt because it's all her fault in the first place. She called me yesturday and told me that she was gonna take me to brunch at 10am and that I could do laundry in Billerica, only problem is I have to get up before 10am so that I can get everything ready. I swear I'm only collecting my VS shirts, pants, and some socks. I really should do more than that but I don't want to be there forever.

The LOCI movie is coming on tonight. I"m really excited about it too. VDO and CN together. I could do without that new chick though Annabella whatever her name is. She isn't anything like my Annabelle who never tries to show off her talents. :-D Sorry I just don't like her character. She isn't at all ike Eames. It's like the same thing they did when they brought in the Doggett and Reyes dou on The X-files. They switched the roles that the female and male played but other than that not much else changed. They wanted to try to keep the same formula or whatever but it just feels like a cheap ripe off of the original. *sigh*

Well that's it for now. Can you believe it. It's been less than a month since I last posted. Pretty amazing if I do say so myself.

TTYL!

Laterz!

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October 21, 2005

Bored, well I'm boring, lol :-D

So I know I haven’t written forever. I haven’t really had much to write about. Last weekend Jen and I went to Delaware for some shopping. Now I don’t have that much money to get through the week. I came home after spending a ton of money to find out that I had to pay my Nstar bill ASAP. So it was food or well heat, computer, hot water. I chose everything else. I was planning on going on a diet anyway.

The good news I am trying to get a transfer to MD. I hope it will go through. I’m not sure it will though. I’m just getting so sick of working with Rob. It’s even worse now that Jen is working with me and is my higher up. We when actually all work it’s great. I love it. But Rob sometimes gets all pissy and that’s no fun. He gets obsessive about the littlest things. Like we can’t clock in until after we change because apparently it adds up to a half an hour each week. Which is total bull but whatever.

Now whenever Jen wants to talk about Billy she can. I don’t know sometimes it just drives me crazy because it’s Billy this and Billy that. It’s almost like she completely forgot that he dumped her over text message.

I also got TiVo recently. I love it. It’s wonderful. Now I can when watch everything without commercials. It’s so much fun. I didn’t have to worry about setting the VCR when Jen and I went away for the weekend. Oh and now I can watch Daria. I love Daria!

So I’m not sure I told everyone but I got a kitten. She is a cutie. Johnson loves her, Emmitt, well he doesn’t hate her. Anyway she is so cute and I named her Mei Mei, it means little sister.

Oh my new favorite show is Related. Okay not favorite but it’s a really good show! It’s so funny.

Anyway there isn’t anything else going on. Tell me what you want. I’ll try to write more later.

TTYL!

Laterz

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September 27, 2005

More thoughts on the robbery

So Carle called me the other day and asked me an important question that I thought I would share with you. Did the robbery and being held at gun point bring back memories of the rape? I know I have talked about it before here but this is something that I thought I should address.

Yes I do suffer from PTSD in the worst way, however the rape was not at the forefront of my mind at the time. I am actually not sure what I thought at the time. I remember looking at the gun and thinking it was fake. I remember thinking that even if it was made out of plastic it could still shoot bullets and they could still hurt. I don’t remember anything else really. I know that while I was trying to put the money it the guys bag I saw a customer outside the store looking in and I started mouthing to him, please help us, please… He didn’t do anything, bastard.

Anyway I don’t remember what else I was thinking. Just afterwards being really upset and completely stressed out. I remember panicking because I knew there was a robbery procedure that we are suppose to follow but I couldn’t remember what it was. The other girl that was with me, Elizabeth, thought that we were going to be killed. I don’t think I thought that. I think I was in so much shock that it felt like I left my body. I kind of feel that way about the rape sometimes too. That the reason I don’t remember a lot of details from it is because once I felt that knife on me I started to go somewhere else.

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September 21, 2005

The mother of all recaps...

So I know I haven’t written in forever. I called Carle today and she scolded me and told me I had to post tonight. So here I am, it’s almost midnight and I’m trying to find a way to post everything that has happened:

-Two weeks ago today I was held up at gunpoint at the VS. No one got hurt. The guy got his money and then he left. I can’t say too much because the police said so.

-I had a few days off afterward. I didn’t get paid for all of them.

-I have been told that I’m going to be transferred to another store. I don’t want to go.

-Jen and Jared have moved in together. No they aren’t dating but it makes it hard to go see Jen.

-Jen’s ex-boyfriend Billy started talking to her again. He is the one that dumped her over text message. She is still in love with him.

-Jen’s grandpa died. She went over to Billy’s spend the night. Even after she found that Billy has a really embarrassing problem that she promised not to tell anyone about. I told her it wasn’t a good idea.

So for more details please click to continue.

Let "The mother of all recaps..." disturb you more...

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August 24, 2005

Howdy!

OMG! I know it's been so long but really there hasn't been much going on in my life. Just work and stuff.

My friend Jasmine moved up to Boston which is exciting. We are going around this week to some resturants because they are at a discount price this week.

I'm going to DE this weekend to be with my parents. Which means that I have to go to the Shaw's tomorrow to try to get a bigger litter box for my cats. I don't want them to run out of litter while I'm away even though it's only going to be for a few days. I'm not gonna ask Jared to come look in on them either because well he is going to be busy moving in with Jen.

That's right! Jen and Jared are moving in together! I can't believe it. Can you? Just as roomies, even though Jared might not think so. Jen is actually in the process of trying not to fall for this younger guy. I think she is just feeling lonely though, I'm sure it won't be a problem.

Anyway I saw this little quiz and I decided to take it, well it's not a quiz but anyway here it is.

How to make a Laney

Ingredients: 1 part pride 5 parts crazyiness 5 parts beauty

Method: Layer ingredientes in a shot glass. Top it off with a sprinkle of fitness and enjoy!

How to make a Laney Marie

Ingredients: 3 parts pride 1 part arrogance 5 parts beauty

Method: Blend at a low speed for 30 seconds. Add caring to taste! Do not overindulge!

Username:

Personality cocktail
From Go-Quiz.com

I think they added too much beauty oh and too much pride too. I don't know if pride is the right word. More like stuborness, but oh well... Whatever!

I also got bored and decided to try to find out what icecream flavor I am. Don't ask who came up with this one but here it is...

Your Icecream Flavour is...Neopolitan!

You aren't satisfied with just one flavor. They say variety is the spice of life and this shines through in your Ice cream of choice! Just don't eat all the chocolate and leave the strawberry and vanilla behind!

What is your Icecream Flavour?
Find out at Go Quiz

TTYL!

Laterz!

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August 12, 2005

The woes of a Shoppe girl

So it’s been awhile since I’ve posted. I can’t believe that August is almost over already! I’ve been really busy this last week and a half though. I’ve been on the hunt for a kitten! I almost had three different kittens but all the people were from New Hampshire and they’ve never been to Newburyport before. I could only go as far as Newburyport. One actually got there I think but since she didn’t call me before like I had asked her too I didn’t go. I thought she was a little sketchy though. They all are refusing to bring vet records with them and I keep begging them to have the records faxed to me before I meet them but they don’t respond. I’m not sure about the whole thing. But since tomorrow is Saturday I can take the kitties to the free clinic in Allston and have them tested for FIV and FeLv which are the two things that I’m worried about cause I don’t want Johnson or Emmitt to get them.

Other than that not much has been going on. I have decided to quit the Vitamin Shoppe. But I really need to redo my resume before I start job hunting and I’m hoping to do that this weekend. I told Jen that I would hang out with her and this other girl from her store who just moved here but if I have to go pick up kittens or go to the vet I won’t be able to. Oh well…

I really need to start looking for places to donate my gmail invites too. I feel bad because I have like 50 gmail invites and I know people used to donate them to the military so that families could e-mail each other but I think they don’t need anymore. Oh well…

Time to get ready for work. I think I might be able to pick up kittens tonight but I’m not 100% sure, but I have to bring the cat carrier with me just in case!

One really exciting thing is that it's tax free weekend in MA this weekend. Woohoo! I don't have much money but I have some so yea! I'm not sure what I'll get. Probably just pet stuff, no money for excess stuff but a new digital SLR camera would be nice! Maybe next here though...

TTYL!

Laterz!

Laney broke down at 9:10 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

August 1, 2005

Remember me!

Hi everyone! OMG! I can't believe it's August! I just can't!

Well guess what! I've made it through my first three weeks of working in Boston VS, it's been hellish but oh well. Linda is coming tomorrow and we are going to have a meeting to help Rob become a manager. Like something like that can be done in one meeting. All I know is once I'm done with MS Office training and I can get my certifications I'm so out of there!

Okay good news I get my health insurance starting tomorrow. Woohoo! I've been taking my meds every other day because I don't have the money for the Rx's that I have to fill. If I can fill it tomorrow I'l so going to take the day off work. Oh wait, can't must have meeting with Linda. Damn!

Well ttyl!

Laterz!

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July 22, 2005

OMG so annoying...

It's like 100 degress outside, okay not really but it feels like it. The AC at the store is dying. My new manager Rob is a total flake who only thinks about sales and forgets that we can't sell it if it's not on the shelf. Oh and someone on my floor smoked weed for like three hours!

Okay maybe not that long but because it's so hot and sticky the smell stayed in the building forever! Tomorrow after I do laundry I'm totally going to buy insense. Sue is getting me a burner for my b-day woohoo!

I have totally decided that I can't buy a sidekick II even though everyone that walks buy me seems to have one. My monthly expenses are just too high right now. It's okay though. I figure if I really really still want one in Feb. when my cell phone contract is up then I'll get one. It would be awesome to have one. But I really don't need it.

Jen and I were suppose to hang out this weekend, actually she was suppose to call me last night. But neither thing happened. I don't think she and I are really gonna hang this weekend either. I'm feeling way lazy. I really just need sleep. Maybe some liquor. Of course I say that I won't go out drinking with her but we all know that come tomorrow night she'll call and be like, wanna go to Kinsel? Ugh! I hate that place. The food there is totally expensive and well the only reason we go is cause she likes some of the waiters there.

I'm totally freaking about the stuff going on in London though. I so was going to go to London this summer. Now I'm super happy I couldn't afford it. Better to be alive with a laptop, okay I know that sounds really cold but really, it is! Still though It's freaking me out because like six hours before the second bombings happened I was looking out my bathroom window thinking I really want to move out of the city cause if terrorists attacked my apartment so wouldn't be left standing!

Let "OMG so annoying..." disturb you more...

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July 12, 2005

I spend way too much money!!!

So I have tracked my expenses for the last three days and I spend way too much money! Since Monday I have spent $67.76 USD! I really can't believe it. I had no idea! I am not spending any money on food tomorrow. Well I think I have to spend a little because I'm trying this new diet and while I have Banana's I didn't buy the shakes that I was going to buy tonight because I didn't want to have to carry them home. Which means I'm going to have to get up super early tomorrow to go get them. They are having a really great sale at Target.

Boy, am I glad that I didn't get that Sidekick yet. I'm totally waiting at least a month.

In said news my last remaining gerbil, Gigi, lost her top two front teeth so I don't know what I'm going to do. I trimmed the buttom ones so that she would stop cutting her gums on them but I don't know how long she has been without food or anything because I kept putting food in and I thought she was eating it. I went out today and bought her some gerbil pellets and a morter so that I could grind them. I have made three different dishes for her. One that is just baby food, chicken and veggies, one that is a mix of the baby food and the pellets, and one that is just pellets and water. So she has three food dishes now. I'm hoping that this will encourage her to eat.

You know the worst thing is that I really need to get my eyebrows waxed! I was going to go today but now I think I'm gonna have to wait till Saturday. I better call tomorrow and make an appointment.

Well that's it for now!

TTYL!

Laterz!

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July 9, 2005

blah blah blah....

I wrote in my journal again today. I like it but I was so tired that I mostly just slept on the train today. Plus Vincent called on the way home so I didn't have any writing time then.

I still really want the Sidekick. I went to T-mobile and the girl there was very nice and said that I could totally port my number after my cingular contract was done. I'm not sure what I'm gonna do though.

I kind of want to sign up for the data plan for the Sidekick and then switch later because even though with the pay as you go I won't be paying the activation fee I'll have to pay it later for the post-paid plan.

So now I have to go back again and find out about that. I'm still not a 100% sure I want it though. Now that I'll be going back to the Boston store I'll be much closer to my home and I'll won't be able to use the internet there at all because there is always something to do there. Seriously. It's so busy durning the day that you don't have any downtime until the evening and then you have to work on shipment because it's all over the place.

I think the best thing is to wait until after I'm there a week or two and see how things go because what if I get the thing and don't use it?

Let "blah blah blah...." disturb you more...

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July 8, 2005

Day of the Shoppe Girl

Below you will find an entry from my paper journal which I started today to help me keep better track of what is going on in my crazy life!

-----

So my online therapist says that while it’s great that I have a blog, or journal, where I talk about myself in the first person that I tend to go weeks and sometimes months without updating it and that she has serious doubts that I just spend that time locked up in my room sleeping and not doing anything. So she told me since my old boss at the art gallery gave me this book that I should use it. I would like to point out that I have another journal too! But because that is a childhood or rather teenage journal where I was still busy and very learned in the art of hiding my emotions even from myself, that while the book is probably only 20 pages full I should close it and start this one. Okay I don’t really have an online therapist. I wish that I had one though. I know they are probably out there somewhere but I saw a news report one time about how you could totally be conned out of your money that way. I am sure it is true and I really should get a therapist but right now I’m kind of low on funds. Which brings me to the real reason for this book. I do have a blog, a very nice one actually. But sometimes I sit in front of the computer and I have no idea what to type and since I am not online all the time I need some way to record my thoughts so I can later put them online or rather on my blog. True I have a PDA, which I love very much but I hate the pecking, well it’s really more like poking at the right part of the screen. I can’t really do the graffiti on it and I mostly use it for keeping everyone’s phone number and my appointments straight. So writing it is. Until I can get a BlackBerry or Sidekick and figure out how to update via email. If I get a Sidekick I’ll have net access so that would be easy to update with but we’ll see what my funds allow.

Vincent called me earlier. He left a message because I didn’t pick up, but really what did he expect? We got the cell phones for a reason! So he wouldn’t have to call me from pay phones! Sometimes I wonder about him. Oh well he told me to pick up the next time even if I didn’t know the number. I’ll try, if he calls that is, he hasn’t yet!

My old therapist has told me that it was good for me to write down my thoughts and events of my day because I have this nasty habit of thinking of myself in the third person. Who does that? Well she told me that people like me, who have been traumatized with sexual abuse and rape and even some people who have been adopted start to try to disassociate themselves from their lives because they don’t want to own their trauma or feel like they don’t deserve the life that ahs been given to them through the adoption. So sometimes they think in the third person but that’s okay because it’s just their own mental defense trying to protect them and get them through the day. She then said that if I start to keep a journal even on a weekly basis it would help me to see that it was okay to own my life because I survived my rape and sexual abuse and because my adoption was a gift that no one can take away from me. That even if I didn’t talk about either thing in my journal it was okay because it would just be a tool for self-affirmation.

So that’s where I am and why I’m trying to scribble this down so I can later type it up for my blog. I really really want that BlackBerry or the SideKick. I’m not picky, I’ll take either. I do have to find out if I can go from a prepaid to a real plan. I’m not ready to try to cancel my Cingular phone plan but I do like my number so I have to make sure that I can keep that too. Right now I have birthday funds that I can use to get the SideKick which I think is slight beter than the BlackBerry because some of the new BlackBerrys don’t have real mini-keyboards and the SideKicks do.

---

I wrote a lot more in my journal but I’m starting to fall asleep so I think that tomorrow I’ll finish up this entry. I just wanted to get some of it up before I went to bed.

TTYL!

Laterz!

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July 6, 2005

My Birthday....

So now I'm a officially 24 years old. How depressing is that! Just kidding. So far I see no difference between 24 and 23, none at all. Oh well. That's life.

On my birthday I got to have lunch with my family because most of them were all still in CT since we had a party the day before. It was nice. We had lobster, which is one of my favorite shell fish. Then they gave me carrot cake, again one of my favorites. I don't know why I like carrot cake for a birthday cake, most people don't. I guess I'm just silly.

Anyway now it's July, it's not really hot here, yet. It was very hot durning June which was old, but now that it's July I'm starting to need to wear long pants again, odd.

Most of my friends called me on my birthday, which was nice of them, but I left my charger in CT so I felt bad because I wouldn't answer the phone. I needed to hold off until I could get a charger. They left messages though.

Let's see. I might be moved back to the Boston store, if I'm not I'm handing in my two weeks notice. I refuse to keep going out to Braintree. It's seriously cramping on my cash flow. It costs me more to go out there than I earn, evil.

Morty is up now. I better go play with him. He loves to go out in the city and I'm trying to find him a bag that I can carry him in. Now that it's summer it's too hot for him in my purse. I need something that he can stick his little head out of but not the rest of his body. Which is pretty hard to find since from everything I've read it says that if a ferret can stick their head out then can get their whole body out. Oh well!

TTYl!

Laterz!

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May 30, 2005

The evil of head colds

So I have had this head cold for the last week and a half now. My ears keep popping every five minutes, my head feels like it's stuffed with cotton, and my sinuses are pretty much as hard as a rock. I've tried everything. Nothing works. I even bought some Claritin-D but that stuff just made me sleepy. It's evil. Meanwhile I have to keep going to work. Just two more days though. Thank god!

So I really am thinking about quiting the Vitamin Shoppe. The thing is I don't like the company, they screw everyone over. They upped the pay scale but they didn't increase anyone's current salary, which hello, is so rude. I know a lot of companies do this but their reasoning for upping the pay scale was so that they would be able to hire people and keep them. Well that doesn't make any sense when people like Brad and Ana who have been with the company more than four years will be earning either the same as or less than someone who just gets hired today or tomorrow. Then those people who have been with the company will want to leave.

At the same time I really like working with Ana. Working with creepy Jared, rude Mike, and doesn't-show-up-to-work Pierre I could live without. But I feel bad for Ana because her staff is a little lacking to be desired, at the same time I know they are very loyal to Ana and they will help her out when and if she needs it. So if I leave, not a big deal. I will be screwing over Ana but she will understand. It's not like she really fought to have me there. She asked to have me put there. She did almost quit when they put this other guy there instead of me but that was because that Jim guy went behind her back when he said that he was going to keep her in the loop. But she came back before they said they would put me in there. And they did make it seem like they weren't going to put in that store because Jim did call and was like, oh well sorry, now that Ana is back we don't need you anymore. She didn't seem to broken up about it, but who knows.

Now I'm about to get ready to leave. Jared is suppose to pick me up since there is no bus today because of the holiday. Evil bus system. I better get ready to go. I have no idea when he is coming. He better remember to pick me up! I'll kill him if he doesn't.

TTYL!

Laterz!

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May 29, 2005

School is over and then it starts again...

So I got a B+ is CL2 which is awesome. I bet if I did the extra credit projects I might have gotten an A- but sleep was so much more important. Anyway in about a week my classes for summer start. Woohoo! Ugh!

I hate working at Vitamin Shoppe, again. I should have just found anotehr job and kept working there part time. It's not I don't know the company, well I don't cause they did screw me over, but it's my staff. I really only get along with Ana. Jared is okay but weird to work with. I don't really like working with him at all. And the two full timers who work there I don't like working with at all because they don't listen to me. Ugh!

So why do I want to travel an hour and 15 minutes to put up with these people? I have no idea.

I am thinking of trying to find a new job, something Monday through Friday 9am to 5pm. It would be nice. But I feel bad for Ana cause she is my friend and for Linda our new District Manager because she has been really nice to me. We will see how it goes.

TTYL!

Laterz!

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May 9, 2005

Done! Done! Done!

Finally! I'm finished! I've just finished the very last essay for Children's Lit 2 that I will ever have to do! So far I have B+ in the class, I doubt the teacher will give me an A- because I've missed so many classes but I don't care, I'm just glad that it's over with! My last essay sucked. In my defense the book sucked too! But the last three essays that I just did today are really good. I hope he likes them a lot. I'll finish posting up all of the essays later this week. I'm just so happy because I'm done! DONE! DONE! DONE!

My mom is coming to visit me on Thursday. this is much cause for stress because 1) I have to clean, 2) I have to hid some of the computer stuff I have, 3) I have to do some more work on the paintings that I haven't done, 4)No one in my family knows about Morty. There is a long story as to how and why they never found out, but I really dont' feel like going into that right now. I'm just going to pack up my things and great ready for her. *sigh*

Well on the plus side, I managed to get Jen off the phone so I could finish my work. I felt bad, cause I was really close to being done, but she just wanted to go on and on about her day and how frustrated she was. There are just some times when you can't deal with people, and when you are about to finish the last essay that you ever have to do for a class, while that's one of those times. She understands though, plus I told her I would call her back after I got out of class today.

I hope the class is short. I don't want to be there forever tonight. There are many things that I need right now, sleep is one of them.

Well it's time to head out now. If I leave now I might have a chance to go to BBKing and get a crispy chicken sandwhich, they have the best ones. I might go to Wendy's though to save time.

TTYL!

Laterz!

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May 3, 2005

Help for victims

So I found this website about a month ago and then I lost it. I liked it because it really talked about aquaintance rape and what victims went through. It really explained a lot to me about why I am the way that I am. I am not sure if this is the same website but it is just as good and really explained to me why I have the issues I do with sex. I use it to for power, which, nah duh, but I guess seeing it makes me feel like I'm not the only one. So I decided to share. TTYL!

Take care everyone!

Laterz!

Women's Web --- Violence Against Women: Acquaintance Sexual Assault/Date Rape

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April 26, 2005

Death to recaps...

Okay I know I haven't posted in forever but I've been totally busy.

I got promoted at work and am now working at Braintree, the bain of life. I love it though. Working with Ana again is so much fun! I love her, she is like a sister to me. Working with Jared is not as much fun as I thought it was going to be. He turned out to be a total selfish brat. Oh well, some guys can't help it. Jen keeps joking that she is going to call him up and tell him that she is never talking to him again because he is a selfish-bastard. But she is only joking, she doesn't talk to him in the first place.

I have this lump on the back of my neck. I'm not sure what it is. But after a few weeks I'll have full health coverage from Vitamin Shoppe so I'll be able to check it out. Woohoo!

I met Pete's friend Melissa today. She is really nice. I like her a lot already and I've added her blog to my blog roller, here is hoping that it will show up.

There is this art gallery thing that I have to go to tomorrow before work. Should be interesting. I really don't want to go. But I have to. I wonder if a doctor's note will get me out of it? Hm...

Well that's it for now. Cheers to me cause I won Best Digital Photography in the Student Art Show and I have four pieces in the show. WOOHOO!

TTYL!

Laterz!

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April 20, 2005

My life in a minute or less...

Peter came up to see me this weekend. We had fun. I tried my best to help him with the whole situation with his friends back in MD. I hope I helped

My teacher in the one class that I'm still taking showed up at work today. I told him that I was sick. What was I suppose to say? I have Dysmenorrhea and I can't treat it because my liver doctor doesn't want me to take the pill?

Anyway nothing else really has happened yet. I'm still waiting for approval to work at Braintree. The background check isn't done yet. Hopefully they will finish it tomorrow.

Well Laterz!

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April 15, 2005

And the world was turned upside down...

In a matter of seconds too! I can't believe it. So here is how my day went.

Woke up at Vicent's, I spent the night there the last two nights. It was weird, I got like no sleep. Okay I never get any sleep but this time I really didn't get any! And I couldn't come online and post or do anything fun because I was at his place. Remind me not to go to his place again. I can't sleep nor do fun internet things cause well I don't want him knowing about this blog. I hope he doesn't find it.

Decided that I wasn't going into work until 9am. Called work at like 8am and they didn't even notice that I wasn't there. Geez! You leave early one day and you are like a meanlingless nothing the next. Actually that wasn't the case. Brad was suppose to open but Mary opened because he called her and told her that he was sick. So Mary didn't know that I was suppose to be there. I worked till 1pm and ran home to put my stuff down and check some e-mail. I love the internet!

I was busy doing my net stuff when the phone rang. I finally got to it because I have just recently changed all the rings on my phone. When someone calls who I work with it rings one way, and so on. Well this was the general ring of someone I didn't know, so I wasn't rushed until I realized that it could have been a real estate agent. Evil people that they are!

Anyway I go to try to answer listen to the message and Vincent calls. He talks about something stupid for awhile. Finally I just say, Vincent, You know I like talking to you but someone just called right before you and I need to check the message cause if it's one of those stupid agents again I don't want them walking in on me. He hung up. I played the message and....

Let "And the world was turned upside down..." disturb you more...

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April 13, 2005

Recaps of my knee caps...

I just like to rhyme. I have no news on my knee caps other than the fact that they are still attached to my legs, which they should be.

Anyway I'm just writing to say that I've been busy. I dropped CL1 because it was evil. Woohoo! No more CL1!

I heard that I won't be the Assistant Manager of Braintree. Ana decided to quit because Jim told Jared, the other assistant there, before he told Ana. So freaking rude. Now our new DM Linda is begging Ana to stay so Jim wants me to call him today when I go into work. I don't know. Ana said she doesn't know if she will stay and I only want to go to Braintree if Ana is there.

After about a week of PMS my period finally came yesterday, thankfully before I went to the gallery. Now we are day two of blood coming out of every pore of my body. Just thought you would like to share in my pain!

Peter is coming to visit me on Friday and he'll be here for the weekend. I'm still going to try to make him decide to move up here. Just kidding. There are some interesting things going on with his "friends" down in MD and I honestly have to question their motives. Seems evil to me...

On the other side of my friends' front, boy did that just sound wrong or what? Anyway, Carle got promoted! Yay for Carle! At least one of us is moving up in the world!

Annabelle's website is finally up and running again. It's a small blog but it doesn't have as much blogginess as mine or Carle's, her's is mainly for days when she has bad days, which she doesn't have that often, and for promoting her fan fiction.

Since I have had the honor of reading this story before everyone else I'm posting a link to Her Pain by Annabelle Crane I would encourge all of you who have a blog and like her story to promote it on your site and put a track back link to it! Oh and make sure to leave a review. I'm just about to go do that. I wanted to make a post first.

Alright, that's it for now! TTYL!

Let "Recaps of my knee caps..." disturb you more...

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April 4, 2005

Odd Girl Out, reversed...

So I watched the Lifetime movie Odd Girl Out. Why? Well I figure it will help me when I have teenagers. God, girls are so evil now a days, and having instant messaging just makes it so much easier for them to torment each other.

Now granted in high school I wasn’t popular, but I wasn’t tormented by the popular girls, I was too below their radar, and I’m totally glad for it. I had my group of friends, we were close. But we were mean to other girls, not to their faces. But honestly if some new girl came up and said hi we probably would have just shut her out, we would have been nice to her face, but we wouldn’t have sought her out or anything. It was weird…

I had like two different groups of friends and even though they were all great they would have never gotten along with each other. In my senior year I had the friends through my friend Luke and my friends through my friend Vicky didn’t get along with them. I had to like alternate days where I would eat launch with them. I don’t think it was that they didn’t really get along it was just they were different. Different cliques so things just didn’t work out that way.

Let "Odd Girl Out, reversed..." disturb you more...

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April 3, 2005

It's raining in Boston fifty miles east …

Where you should be, no one's around
It's raining in Boston, baby
But everything else is the same
Counting Crows

I am serious, it’s been raining here all day and all night. It’s like the sky just opened up and started crying, maybe it’s sad cause the Pope died. Pope John Paul II passed away yesterday and the Catholics of the world grieved. They still are. Now I’m Catholic, I think he was a good man, he gave a lot of people faith, but honestly people, this should not come as a shock to you! The man has been through so much already, and they were talking about putting him on feeding tube. It was like Terri Shiavo all over again. Thankfully God has his way and John Paul II is now in heaven. I am happy for him because now he is with God now and God was such important part of his life, as he should be for all of us. I don’t think everyone should be grieving for him though. They should be joyful since he was able to pass peacefully.

I was talking to Carle though, and she brought up a very good point. He was a man, just a man. I think people in the Catholic religion forget that sometimes. I’m not sure what it’s like in other parts of Christianity but Catholics do pray to God but when we do things that are important like confess we do it to a priest, because apparently he is more connected to God than you or I. This is where I do not agree with my religion. I am very connected to God. I feel him, or her if you prefer, with me every day. He gives me strength to keep going sometimes. There are times when I do not listen to him, like when I’m with Vincent. But I truly belief that God loves me and will forgive me for my pre-martial indiscretion.

Let "It's raining in Boston fifty miles east …" disturb you more...

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April 2, 2005

Jacob, are you listening to me!!!!

I have no idea who Jacob is, but the line popped into my head as I was making this post so...

Recaplet:

-The art work from the student show as judged. Four of my five pieces were selected for the show! That's the most out of all of the interns. And one guy had this totally awesome piece too. It was made up of six paintings, all different styles of masters. It was great! I mean I really loved it. I guess the Judges didn't so much. Oh well. What the hell do they know!

-Vincent and I had a major fight. You know for not being a in real relationship we sure do act like it. I think the friends with benifits thing is harder than actually dating. At least with dating you know where you stand, but as FWB's the line gets burred a lot. We aren't fighting right now but who knows.

-Jim from VS is totally screwing with me. I really want to transfer to Braintree but I don't think he'll let me. Even though he, "Really enjoyed our conversation last time." Of course he enjoyed it. I always know what to say during interviews.

-I'll be up all night doing my stupid CL1 homework. God! I really should just drop this class and take a different one. I wish I could take CL2 twice. CL1 sucks!

-Johnson is currently using Emmitt has his pillow, it's very cute. Sorry no pictures. If I try to take pictures of them while they sleep they always move. It's evil!

-Peter is suppose to be coming to visit me soon. We'll see. I'm excited!

Okay that's it for now. TTYL!

Latez!

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March 27, 2005

Easter Sunday

I swear, I must of burned like a gillizion calories today. My friend Jazzy from CA came to visit, she might be living in Boston next year which would be totally awesome. Anyway, she, Jen, and I walked around Boston all day today. We even went to Harvard Square. I haven’t been there in forever. I forgot how much fun Urban Outfitters is, oh and how much it cost! I really have to dip into my bank account less for drinks. I’m not going out anymore this week. I need money for new clothes.

Nothing less really happened. I called my family in DE and I talked with everyone. My mom and I were really the only ones that talked cause I’m not really used to talking to my sis-in-law and my brother and my dad were both acting like the worst conversationalists in the world! Tomorrow I have to get up early so I’m calling it a night.

TTYL!

Happy Easter!

Laterz!

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March 26, 2005

The recaplet of all times...

So I haven't posted. Well I've been busy. I finished my art pieces, well for the most part anyway. So here what has been going on.

-Finished 4 out of 5 pieces for a grand total of 5 pieces, maybe will just forget about piece number 6

-Was asked if I wanted to be promoted to Braintree as Asstiant Manager, said yes

-Mary's creapy stalker MBTA cop started calling her again, went with her to police who told her to go to the office that creapy stalker guy works in to fill a complaint, big help. Mary went with Jen and me while we got our eyebrows done so that she wouldn't be alone for the rest of the day. She's thinking of moving out of state. I hope she doesn't.

-Talked with Regional Manager who basically didn't tell me if I was going to get promoted or not

-Got my hair dyed to get rid of annoying light brown highlights. Woohoo!

-Found out that Jared knows about possible move to store in Braintree, oh crap!

-Went with Vicent after getting hair dyed. We fought, we are doing that a lot. I think he doesn't like the idea of me working with Jared. I keep telling him that Jared is in love with Jen. That I know that Jared is in love with Jen and is just using me to try to get to Jen, he keeps saying why do I let Jared use me then. He does have a point. I guess the truth of the matter is that I know that Jared isn't only using me to get to Jen, plus Jared knows about the rape and child abuse and Vincent doesn't, well not as much as Jared does anyway. So it makes it easier to talk to Jared. Why is life so complicated?

-Watched Medicial Investigation, DARN IT! Would they just let Natalie and Stephen kiss already! And what about Eva and Miles, she didn't acknowledge the fact that he almost died. Okay granted she did just loose the kid she thought she was going to adopt, but come on, shouldn't she transfer all that emotion on to him! GRR! Oh and what was with that Dr. Ewing, is she going to be a new primary on the show? I hope not because for some reason think she and Stephen have some kind of past, and not the professional kind.

-Decided to skip Children's Lit 1. Too much emotional turmoil going on in my life and I don't think I can handle the demeaning state the evil vile teacher puts me in because we aren't allowed to go the bathroom when we need to go, it would brake me, it would just brake me.

-Had weird freaky dreams, finally. I haven't been sleeping well these past few days. I'm so happy to have my dreams back. But they were weird, and freaky. But I love them. I missed them!

-Woke up. Called Boston, talked to Brad. Told him to let me get ready for class. He doesn't need to know that I really am just going to go back to sleep and not go to class.

-Wrote this entry...Oh wait, we are all caught up now. Okay! :D

So now I have to find some photo paper to print my pieces on. WOOHOO! I wonder if anything is going to be open tomorrow? I mean besides resturants and church. I really want to buy some photo matts but I don't have time now. I woke up too late. We'll see how it goes.

TTYL!

Laterz!

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March 22, 2005

Sleep Walking...

Seriously I’m so tired. I feel like I’ve been sleep walking through this whole day. I got up. Couldn’t get out of bed for an hour, then I started working on my pieces for the student art show. I finished three pieces today for a grand total of five all together. There is one more piece that I’m working on. But I’m not gonna start on it until tomorrow. I already have the idea. I’m just too tired to deal right now. I’m so freaking sleepy.

Not much happening in the world for me right now. Peter said he might come and visit soon. I’m excited about that. I really should try to get a futon before he comes though. I don’t want him to have to sleep on the couch cause it sucks, and he is taller than I am, but I don’t want to sleep there either cause it hurts my back and I get to wake up with two 15 pound cats who have pretty much tried to kick me off the couch cause they think it’s theirs. Evil cats. Anyway time to take my meds and go to bed! I’m not even gonna bother trying to stay up for L&O:SVU cause I’ve already seen this one. I swear they said they were going to have the Romeo Juliet one where the kids killed their mom, but maybe I’m getting the shows mixed up. I’ll have to go check the website again.

TTYL!

Laterz!

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March 21, 2005

Artistic pressure

So let’s see. Today I was accosted, coerced, and just down right tricked into saying that I was going to submit something to the student art show that is coming up in the art gallery. I’m so nervous about it. The only people who have seen my work really are my family. I have two pieces done already but I’m trying to decide if I should resize them so they print out perfectly as 8x10. I want to print them on photo paper. I guess we will just have to see. I’ll probably just make two sizes of the prints and see which one was is cheaper to mount and frame.

Anyway now I have to get all of this done before next week. Eeps! Well I guess we’ll see how it goes. TTYL!

Laterz!

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March 20, 2005

Sunday life days…

So I’m such a bad Christian today because I didn’t go to church. But I hung out Jen today and let me tell you why. Last night I was suppose to hang out with Jen, Mary and Janice, this other woman who comes into the VS all the time. The only thing is that Jen worked in Boston and I was working in Braintree. Boston closes at 7pm which means you get out at 7:30pm. Braintree however closes at 9pm meaning you don’t get out until 9:30pm. Well I was working with Jared who was borrowing someone else car so he was going to have to go back to Sherborn. So I didn’t want to have in to drive into Boston and then drive back out. So I called them and told them that I wasn’t sure that I would be able to go.

That’s when things started to get complex…

Let "Sunday life days…" disturb you more...

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March 19, 2005

Buggin' out

Hey! So I've been working on setting up Annabelle's site. Which let me tell you is so not fun. I have a color scheme and the images that she sent but trying to get it into an MT format, ugh. Oh and I promised to make it skinnable, double ugh! Thankfully I have all day tomorrow to work on it too. I promised I would get it done by the time school starts up again. She finished a new fan fiction, a Law & Order: Criminal Intent one and she said she won't let anyone read it until I fix her site. I understand punishing me, but why punish the public. And she said it was a Goren centric fic, oh she is so mean! *pouts* she probably knows that I'll go looking for it and then won't work on her site. Darn it! I'm only human! My biggest problem is that she knows me too well. Grr!

Anyway back my rant about working on her site. I’ve been sitting playing with the CSS style sheets, trying to make everything so it’s all CSS style coded, but then I decided to just do it the old way because I don’t have time to teach myself all the CSS code out there right now. I’ll just go back later and upgrade after I’m done. So while I was working on this I realized something. Not everyone has their screen set to 1024*760. I forgot about this because for some reason whenever you have Windows XP it sets your screen settings to 1024*760, you don’t have to change it or anything. So I’ve been designing sites at this setting. Now I feel bad because went to look at Damaged-girl.net today and saw that I made a big mistake. The graphic is 800px wide which means if you have your screen set to 800*600 there is some overflow in the first two skins. Oh well. At least Annabelle knew what she was doing when she designed her graphics. *pouts* I’m suppose to be the designer! She’s supposed to be the writer. Laney as to the mouse as Anna is to the keyboard. Our little simile, meaning, I use my mouse to design and Annabelle uses the keyboard to write her stories. *sigh* I guess sometimes things just get a little backwards. At least I speak better English!

Okay back to work! I have to get going soon too. I’m working in Braintree again today, probably for the very last time, woohoo! And darn it! Ana, no not Annabelle Anna, Ana my old roommate Ana, tricked me! I thought I was supposed to be working with her. Last week she said she was working a double last Saturday and then again on this Saturday since Jared got his headlights stolen. God that seems like ages ago, I can’t believe it’s only been one week. Anyway, I called to see if Jim, our regional manager, was cool with me working there this Saturday and she called me back and told me yes. Jared was going to pick me up. DAMNIT! If I had known I would have just worked in Boston with Jen and Brad. Oh well, Ana so owes me! I don’t know when I’ll collect, but this has got to be some karma points for me, or something!

So before I trek over Braintree I have to drag my sorry self to Boston because I have to pick up my pay stubs. Brad gets mad when I leave too many of them in the safe cause he worries that someone may take them and open them. Please I make less than anyone else there cause I’m part-time. Well this time I really am going back to work. But I probably won’t post again tonight cause Jen and I are suppose to hang out with Mary again. I don’t work on Sunday so I don’t care if I get really drunk again. I’m going to 5pm mass, there is no way that my butt is getting out of bed before 8am on a Sunday. Sorry god, I’m not that devoted, but I’m trying.

Well ttyl!

Laterz!

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March 18, 2005

Humanity scares me...

Jen went out last night, sans me because I was still feeling sick plus she was hanging with her friend Priscilla. Anyway they went to some bar but there was a coat check place. There was no one there in the coat check room, you just kind of left your coat there. Anyway they go back after drinking and Jen's coat is gone! It had her house keys it too. I feel so bad for her.

She called me this morning and I was like, girl just take the day off work. You need it. She had been up pretty much all night. She had to spend the night at Priscilla's since she couldn't get into her own apartment. She is back at home now. We are gonna go see The Ring 2 later.

Anyway, I just do not understand why you would go in and steal someone's coat. It's just mean. I mean you all are at a bar to have a good time and then you go and do something stupid and hurtful and steal someone else's coat. It's just wrong. Plus she had a key chain in there from her first date with her ex-boyfriend, sigh. I feel so bad for her. Evil coat stealing scum! I hope you are really hung over today!

Well ttyl!

Laterz!

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March 17, 2005

Ladies' night is just so much fun…

Jen, Mary, and I went out. We got so drunk, well Jen and I did anyway, Mary barely finished one martini. Oh yeah I think I told Carle last night that we had margaritas but I was drunk at the time so can you really blame me? Anyway I had about 2.5 strawberry martinis rode the T home with Jen and then got online and started talking with Peter and Carle. I remember about half of the conversations that I had with them last night. Weird huh? Anyway today was awful! I swear I had food poisoning, that or I ate something that really did not agree with me at all. Seriously my stomach was in so much anxiety it was pretty awful.

Peter, my wonderful friend has decided to give me the nickname of “Kid”. Don’t ask me why. Well I have given him a nickname too, but in order to find out what it is, children please let your parents read this before you do…

Let "Ladies' night is just so much fun…" disturb you more...

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March 16, 2005

People, come on!

Okay seriously today at the Vitamin Shoppe today some guy came in and started yelling at us because he said he brought a multi-vitamin there and it was already open, oh he didn’t have a receipt by the way. Anyway he said that he could of died because he was hypoglycemic, don’t ask me how taking a multi-vitamin from an open bottle could effect hypoglycemia because I don’t know. So he wanted his money back, a new free bottle, and to keep the old bottle because he needed it as evidence. Whatever, do we look that stupid? He didn’t get anything. We told him to call corporate office and then come back when Brad comes back next week.

What people will do to make a buck makes me sick! I mean really is it that hard to get a job? I don’t have anything but a high school degree and I have two jobs! People scamming other people is just wrong. I mean I understand that sometimes it is hard to get a job if you don’t have the right look. Well go home, take a shower, find some clean clothes, try not go fill out an application drunk, and then get an interview. People it’s not that hard. If you are walking around with a cell phone then you have money somehow. Don’t go ripping off other people, it’s just rude.

Tonight I’m going out with Mary and Jen. We are going to get drunk at a local bar, cause there are about a billion of them. Woohoo! Well ttyl!

Laterz!

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March 15, 2005

Ladies and Gentlemen the former President…

Of Ireland. I’m not kidding. The former President of Ireland came to our college today and talked about all the things she went through to make her country a better place. Guess what? I got to sit in the gallery the whole time and wait for the 400 people that were sitting listening to her to come out and maybe come inside the gallery. Fun! But on the bright side I did get a lot of free food and I got to try Irish breakfast tea for the first time. So the day wasn’t a total waste. I made to put all of my stuff under one of the food tables though so I couldn’t work on my laptop from 11am until around 3pm when the whole thing was finally over.

Oh well. Any interesting and profound thoughts today? Well just this one. When is the point of free speech too much? How can we protect kids but at the same time save free speech? We self-censor, but is that a bad thing? If we self-censor too much are we holding kids back? I think it really depends on when you stop censoring.

I think you have to censor children until around the age of 6. Why 6, well because then the start going to school and you know they are going to hear about things from other kids. Do you really want your 7 year old to find out about sex, tampons, breasts, and so on from another child who doesn’t know that much about it in the first place? My mother taught first, second, and third grade. When she was teaching second grade, that’s around age 7 or 8, there was a little girl in her class who started telling some of the other kids in the class that her mommy had her tubes tied so she couldn’t have any more babies when her mommy and daddy had sex. Age 7 or 8! OMG right? Well it happens…

So we have to figure out a way to make kids stop talking about things like this, right? Well that would be nice, in a prefect world. But guess what, no prefect world.

The best way to deal with this is to talk with our children, be open with them. If we are not then will get their information else were and it may or may not be the right information.

God I wish we had a prefect world. It would make life much easier. :D

Oh well! TTYL!

Laterz!

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March 14, 2005

It's a beautiful life...

And it's a beautiful world
And it's a beautiful time
To be here
To be here

Fisher - Beautiful World

I got to listen to this song all day today while I was working the gallery. It was boring for me today at the good old gallery. Anyway the song really made me think. The world is beautiful but there is still a lot of bad things out there and we can't turn our eyes away from it.

I've been thinking about some things that I'd talked with mom about. How when she was little she would go to the store for her dad and such. Now a days we don't think of sending our children out by themselves. We worry about the pedophilia or serial killer next door too much to allow our children out of our sight, or at least many of us think we should. Those of us who don't are accused of allowing our children to run of and do drugs and join gangs. I'm not sure if any of this is true, but if we don't start developing some way for parents to have a support system within their own neighborhood there is no way our children will ever be able to have a good life. The saying it takes a village to raise a child doesn't come from thin air. A stay at home parent because over stressed and without that network of other parents they start not being able to deal and put their child in front of the TV.

There is no easy solution for this. But isn't it time we start looking for one?

Sorry working at the gallery when there is no one there makes my mind wonder.

Laterz!

Laney broke down at 11:33 PM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

March 13, 2005

Sunday...A week of chaos begins

So Brad, our manager, is gone for the week. He won't come back till Saturday. He left and Mary, our assistant manager, closed the store, left $400 out of the deposite sending Ray, our other assistant, into a tizzy, which resulted in him leaving some change out of the deposite and the deposite slip once he had fixed Mary's mistake.

So basically my whole day was filled with listening to Ray bitch about Mary. I finished Roll of Thunder Hear My Cry though, which was a good thing because I thought I was never going to finish that book. It was okay, but it made me sad, and I found it really hard to read the Southern, eubonics, written speech. That was probably the most evil part about the whole book.

So all and all my day was not very filled. I had to work at Vitamin Shoppe, I mean what kind of post did you guys want from me? I did call Jen cause she and I haven't hung out for like ages. I am very sure that she brought up Jared. Weird huh? Anyway we were talking about something and I was telling her about Ana. Then she said something about Jared. I can't remember now. Damn why does that important bit of info have to be so freaking fuzzy!

Oh well. Brad told me that Jen thinks I like Jared. Grr! So evil, and so wrong. I don't like Jared. I wish that Jared and Jen would date. Hello, that's the only reason I'm talking her up to him. Then Jared just started to annoy me because about 75% of our conversations end up being about Jen, what were her SAT scores, where is she going to be living, where is going to be working, what did she think about this. GOD! I like Jen, but I am not like her personal assistant or anything, how on earth am I suppose to know this stuff.

So Sue has come up with the solution. When Jen and I hang out do not tell Jared about it till after the fact. Cause if I say something to him before hand he is going to give me this puppy-dog-eyed look that just makes me want to cry because really I think he has no friends at all. And I will feel sorry for him and ask if he would like to come with. No more! I will not enable Jared's obsession any more. I will be a better friend to both of them by not playing middle man to their stupid mind game. Hell! I may just stop talking to Jared all together. He is really starting to piss me off because I really feel like I'm the one being used here. I hate being used. And people do it to me all the time because the know that I like to feel needed. Stupid mothering instinct, gets me in trouble all the time.

But honestly, if you want to finish reading my rant about this, please click on....

Let "Sunday...A week of chaos begins" disturb you more...

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March 12, 2005

Ear candles and Boris...

So my new favorite song is called Take Me To Heaven by Boris. I've been listening to it non stop since yesturday. It's such a good song.

I went to work in Braintree today. Woohoo! I love working with Ana, even though we were both really tired we had fun. I bought this ear candles which are like the coolest thing ever. You put them in your ear and the suck out the wax. I mean it's kind of gross but its fun too. I have to buy more. I'm sure I didn't get out all the wax but my ears feel better which is really cool!

Nothing much else happened today. I had to go to CL1 which was awful. Students were mad at the teacher because she was a bitch and she tried to explain why she was such a bitch meanwhile I'm just thinking can we please stop talking about this I really would rather just be at home asleep. On the plus side she is letting us redo our papers,the one that she gave me a C+ on but my other teacher when he looked at it gave it an A-. So I'm gonna work on that over the break.

Well it's time for bed now. I only got three hours of sleep last night. I was up talking to Sue and then Carle so sleep didn't seem like something I really needed. Plus I was working on my homework.

TTYL!

Laterz!

Laney broke down at 11:10 PM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

March 11, 2005

The world has been realigned...

The best thing possible in Vitamin Shoppe history has happened. Hillarie has been demoted from her position as District Manager back to store manager of Framingham. I'm so excited! Seriously we have been waiting for this to happen since the day she got promoted. She is such a royal b**ch! She would always be making promises to the home office saying things were done when they weren't done. Evil vile woman.

I told Brad that he had to go talk to the new RM and Marsha, who has some position that I don't know about, and tell them that he wants the job. He said he wasn't sure if he does. I told him that is what he said last time and looked what happened, so the only thing he has to do is try for it and act like he wants it, then when the offer it decide if he really wants it.

Hillarie lasted longer than I thought she would. She got promoted in December of 2003 and she lasted until last week. I really thought she would have been fired sooner. My bet was July 2004 but she hung in there. In the end the right thing happened. She wasn’t an effective district manager. She was mean and vile to the staff and she got what she deserved. A one way ticket back to a store that now hates her guts.

So what else happened yesturday...

Let "The world has been realigned..." disturb you more...

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March 10, 2005

Snapping Bubbles!!!!

SnapBubbles.com - Virtual Bubble Wrap

You have to go there! I love it! They have this new version it's great!

Ha! So I'm on a natural high today. I love life! I'm going tomorrow to get a library card. Life is good.

Nothing much really happened today. I watched Interview with a Vampire and The X-files movie and now I'm watching F.P.S. of L&O: CI which I think is such a good episode which of course I've posted before. Oh Vincent D'Onofrio is so cute in this episode! *sigh* I love it when he smiles and does his giggle thing. I still feel bad for Detective G. Lynn Bishop cause she never lived up to Eames in the viewers eyes or in Goren's. Oh well.

Nothing really happened today so this end of this entry. LOL! TTYL!

Laterz!

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March 9, 2005

Happy Birthday Peter!

It's Pete's birthday! Happy Birthday Pete! I love Pete! If you roll over the Calender (the one that says Powered by PHPCalender) in the menu you will see that's his birthday and that LOCI is on tonight but that's not the point of this post.

LOL. Sorry I feel totally awake right now cause I basically slept like 10 hours. Of course I'm a straving and the only thing I have to eat are my chocolate filled oreos. Ugh!

Anyway Peter is on of my friends from High School and since it's his birthday I figured I should make an entry on how we met and explain why I love him so much, he's just so damned cute! LOL. I'm just kidding Peter is like the older brother I should have had. That's why I love him. Speaking of which I really need to call Todd today!

Okay back to Pete. We met because my friend Vicky and her friend Gina (I'm actually not sure what the girl's name is right now) wanted to join TV crew which was probably about the dorkest thing that we could all ever do but I didn't have anything better to do and I figured hey why not. Anyway Peter and his friends were all already members. The reason I got into it was because the whole crew as made up of guys! I thought, in my teenage youth, that that was completely sexist so I stayed on and tried to work with this people who I thought were just a bunch of geeks. Funny geeks, which is what made it worth my while to stay on there and come back once I'd finished Spring Track and Field. We had this council thing that made decisions on silly things like who was going to be an anchor and such. Well I didn't even know what it was but some how after my first year there I was selected to be put on it. The teachers running the this afterschool program wanted me on there. I figured the only reason behind that was because I was a girl and it would look good but oh well what was I going to do.

Peter was also on that council and he would drive me home sometimes after the meetings since all the buses were gone once the meetings were over. Anyway we started talking and found we actually got along. I'm not sure how but anyway we became really good friends and I'm super glad that I know him.

Whenever I go back to MD I always try to get in touch with him. Oh and I sent him a birthday card which I really hope he gets today.

Well since my day hasn't actually started yet I have nothing else to really write about so I'll probably post again later. TTYL!

Laterz!

Laney broke down at 12:40 PM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

March 8, 2005

Grr! I'm so mad at NBC!

Okay so I finally decided that I was just gonna fall asleep while watching Vincent D'onofrio and I turn on the TV and NBC is showing Will and Grace! Un-freaking-believable! On their website it says that Law & Order: Criminal Intent is suppose to be on! What happened!

Anyway it finally came, I finally got my period! After how many days of freaking PMS. 5 days! Geez! That's just so wrong! So now I'm watching She's All That and I can't a 16-year-old can pull of the forty's style dress that Mackinze, the girl who gave Laney the make-over, is wearing. Also where did Laney get that instant clevage?

So you all know that I had to miss Children's Lit2 last night because of my PMS evilness. Well I e-mailed my Professor and told him I had the stomach flu, cause what am I suppose to do, tell him that I'd been PMS'ing for the last few days and could barely move. Anyway he came to the art gallery today. Grr! So I told I was feeling better but I had to be there cause Laura, my boss didn't have anyone else to cover, which is true, and she had be running around getting read for the concert tonight. I was going home once everything started.

Anyway thankfully he didn't show up again and Gina who works as Laura's aid showed up with food which she very kindly gave to me since I hadn't eaten since yesturday afternoon. Then I covered for her while she was doing her homework in the computer lab since Laura wanted her to hang up signs.

The opening started at 5:30 which was great because by then I was straving and thirsty. They had furit, crackers, cheese, little chicken things, it was all so yummy I had to leave before the concert though. I didn't want to chance running into my Professor again.

I'm glad I left when I did though cause it was snowing and windy. I went to CVS and got chocolate filled oreos, which are okay and I'll finish them but trust me don't bother. The orginals are still the best.

Well that's it for now. TTYL!

Laterz!

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March 7, 2005

Vincent called today...

AT 7AM AFTER I ONLY WENT TO BED AT 4! I swear that boy has no sense of time. He's on his way to work so I must be up. But it's okay I needed to get up anyway. I had to get ready to go work at the Art Gallery. I was a little late cause I was looking for my writing prompts which I didn't find until later tonight. Oh Well! I spent my time in the Gallery just writing, not important. Maybe I'll show you guys later.

Anyway I updated the PetCams and the CityCam today since I didn't go to class. I should go check my e-mail and see if my Professor wrote back to me yet. I hope he got the e-mail okay. I BCC'ed to myself and looked okay when I did that.

So what happened after Vincent woke me up...

Let "Vincent called today..." disturb you more...

Laney broke down at 10:47 PM | (1) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

Hello all my wonderful fuzzy friends...

Seriously I couldn't sleep last night. My skin was all clamy and yucky and I still feel sick. This PMS stuff is seriously demented. Although I don't have it as bad as some people. There was this girl in my Nutrition class this summer who got it so bad that she even had black outs. They made her go to the hospital. I guess she was like really anemic so getting her period made her iron levels way too low. The weird thing is that she was a nurse. I wouldn't have liked to have her for a nurse, if she can't figure out when she needs help herself what good is she to me?

Let "Hello all my wonderful fuzzy friends..." disturb you more...

Laney broke down at 7:41 PM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

Site plugs and snoring ferrets

Mortimer is snoring again. He is really the cutest little ferret in the world! I'm feeling a bit better. I've managed to con Annabelle of TheGifted1.net (sorry not a blog just a Fred site) into including my blog into her signatures at the end of her e-mails cause she always e-mailing fic authors and such. Anyway she did it for me because I told her I would get the set-up of her new MT blog done this week with skinnable templates if she promised to plug me plus she feels bad for me cause of the PMS thing

Anyway miss Annabelle of Middle-of-Nowhere, USA has given me the link to the funniest LOCI (that's Law & Order: Criminal Intent) fan fiction ever. So I'm sharing it with you all. If you don't watch the show you really should. I love it. It reminds me of Mulder and Scully from the X-files in a why. God I miss that show. *sigh* Anyway here is the link Touched by Tres Mechante It's a really good story. I wish you could leave feedback on that site for the other but you can use a PHP mail form. And you should if you like the story. (note to self: send PHPMain to Tres M)Because authors love feedback and as a friend of an author, Annabelle, I have to tell you they get pretty wacky when you don't feedback them. Just Kidding! But really send your praise.

I mean though when you think about it someone like JK Rowling spends what like two years of her life writing a book and then we read it in a day or less even. Two years of your life so that someone can walk into a bookstore and pay 7.95 for a paperback copy and that's it. That's all you get. Being a writer just doesn't seem that rewarding to me. That's why I'm all about being an advocate for feedback whores like Annabelle. Seriously feedback is like a drug for her. She's crazy. She stopped writing due to like of feedback *pouts* She said the muse just left her. Well here I am plugging her FanFic.net stuff. Annabelle's FanFiction.Net Bio Sometime this year her website will be back up. Okay I know you are probably lurking there Anna, I know I said the end of the week but come on, I have work! Spring break is next week. I promise I'll try to get it done around then if not sooner.

Bah! Why do I brother. She won't comment her. She is on strike till I get her site back up and running.

Anyway hope everyone has a wonderful day tomorrow. It's suppose to snow this Friday into Saturday maybe my Children's Lit 1 class will get cancelled and I won't have to deal with my evil CL1 teacher.

Laterz!

Let "Site plugs and snoring ferrets" disturb you more...

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March 6, 2005

The wonderful world of PMS and chocolate doughnuts

I surprise myself more and more everyday. I am totally serious. I wasn't really sure that I could spell the word doughnut but I wanted to use it for the title of this entry and I spelt it the way I thought it should be, then I did a google search. Unbelievable, I spelled it right!

Anyway today I finished reading Out of the Dust by Karen Hesse for my children's lit 2 class, which is tomorrow night. Not a bad book and I can see why it won the Newbery Medal. I really liked it because even though it is like 227 pages each page wasn't full of words. They were kind of centered like you get when you do a blockqoute. The only parts I didn't like where when it was suppose to be the girl's dreams and the words were all floaty on the page, it made it hard to read because my eyes had to jump all over the page.

So the reason for the title of this entry. Well you are just going to have to click and find out...

Let "The wonderful world of PMS and chocolate doughnuts" disturb you more...

Laney broke down at 6:27 PM | (1) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

March 5, 2005

The longest day.... (NC-17 content)

Hi world! I've marked this entry NC-17 because the extended entry is going to be graphic and I don't want to offend any little kiddies. But now for the G-rated portion. Okay today was another winner. LOL. Seriously I finished my Children's Lit 1 homework at like 2:30am but it was because I kept playing with my blog instead of actually working and then I was reading Carle's blog too so it's not totally my fault *grin*, okay so it is but still...

Anyway I got another evil grade on my reading logs for Children's Lit. A check minus. Unbelievable. I worked so hard on them. I swear the teacher just hates me. Maybe she is reading my blog... Hmm. Oh well. I'm taking my logs to my other Children's Lit teacher and I'm going to have him go over them and see what he thinks. He's the head of the department and I know he really likes me so...

Work was fun. I worked with Ana today. I actually did work. I hardly ever do work at VS but I worked my butt of today even though I was going through major PMS. I seriously almost got up close and personal with the trash can in my hallway on my way back to my apartment. But I started to feel better once I was at work and I did have fun. Ana were joking a lot and we made fun of everyone we work with. We just have fun making up stories about people. It lets the time pass. Plus Ana drove me home which was really cool.

I have to go to work tomorrow though. I thought I might have the day of because I'm suppose to work with Jared tomorrow. Well the only way I was going to be dragging my sorry butt to Braintree on a Sunday was to have him drive me. I called and left to messages and he hadn't called back. Finally around 9pm right before Ana and I were going to close the store he called. He said the headlights from his car had been stolen, again! So he wasn't going to be able to drive his car since it would be after sunset when the store closed. But he was borrowing his friend's car, so if I wanted he could drive into Boston and pick me up. He was trying to make me feel guilty for the fact that he's in the freaking suburbs right now and it will take him a half hour going in the wrong direction to pick me up. Please! I told him that it was up to him, I didn't really need the hours, but that if he didn't pick me up tomorrow he was going to be working by himself because that's the only way I'm going to Braintree on a Sunday. He said that should like it was good for him, the he laughed and said no, he would come and pick up. I was so hopefully for about 2 seconds that I wouldn't have to go to work (side note: Morty just barked in his sleep, totally cute!) But no, stupid Jared is going to come and pick me up. I told Ana after I hung up that I was praising God when Jared said he wasn't gonna pick me up and that I would have even gone to Church because I was so thankful. Seriously I'm PMS'ing. I don't want to work. Anyway now I'm not going to church because there is no way I'm going to make it back from mass before 10am because there is no way I could get my sorry butt out of bed before 8am on a Sunday, it's just evil to be up before 8 on a sunday, evil!

Well here comes the portion of my log that is not rated for little kiddies. If you are under the age of 17 please do not read any futher...

Let "The longest day.... (NC-17 content)" disturb you more...

Laney broke down at 11:20 PM | (1) were disturbed | (1) have TrackBack

March 4, 2005

Snoring cats and MP3 players

I have another reader who is commenting! WOOHOO! Thank you so much Carle. I really appericate someone else out there who knows what I've been through reading this. I have a very personal post that I'm going to make hopefully tomorrow, I've been putting it off because it brings back bad memories but I hope you will come back and read it. Oh I've added you to my links too! Thanks again :D !

Okay so I didn't finish my homework which means I'll have to go to class to hand it in tomorrow, but I'm thinking of just going and handing it and saying that there was a death in the family and the funeral is today so I won't be able to stay for class cause my uncle is picking me up and taking me to CT so I can go. I wasn't planning on going but I don't have a choice now and I'll make up the class on Wednesday night. Even though I don't want to. Oh hell! I'll just drink a gallon or so of coffee it's just not worth it! I mean seriously my teacher is such a freaking bitch!

This really drives me crazy....

Let "Snoring cats and MP3 players" disturb you more...

Laney broke down at 11:50 PM | (2) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

March 3, 2005

Skinnable, it's so yummy

Well I have been very busy... Okay not doing what I'm suppose to be doing but hey, can you blame me? I found the php stuff that makes my site skinnable and well I had three skins so... I like all my skins but I think the 3rd one is nice because of the soft colors. What's your favorite?

Not much going on here, it's freezing outside so I really don't want to go out but I have no food so I think I'm gonna have to. Time to buy a T-pass, ugh. I feel like I waste $44 every freaking month. Well that's it for now. I'll write again if anything else exciting happens!

I have decided to add more to this entry, so please read on...

Let "Skinnable, it's so yummy" disturb you more...

Laney broke down at 2:23 PM | (1) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

March 2, 2005

WOOHOO!

I've fixed this site so now it's pretty much working the way it should be! This is very exciting for me. All the Archive pages are working the way they should be. Yea!

I'm working on some skins for this site. I have to get some good color schemes first so this whole thing may take while. Plus I have to find a new way to display my links and stuff. Hmm... This is all very exciting. Woohoo!

Oh yeah my life outside of the internet....

Let "WOOHOO!" disturb you more...

Laney broke down at 3:18 PM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

February 19, 2005

What a field day for the heat...

OMG! I am so sick! I feel so awful. My stomach isn't getting any better. I swear it's getting worse. I almost died in class today. I also kept falling asleep which isn't good but oh well. At least I'm not like some of the psychos in my class. I swear there are so many drug addicts in that class and it's a childern's lit class, it's so scary to think of some of these people teaching kids. Really scary.

Anyway yesturday was fun....

Let "What a field day for the heat..." disturb you more...

Laney broke down at 1:11 PM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

February 18, 2005

My wonderful recaplet...

Okay seriously I had fun yesturday. I pretended that I was someone else. Someone who was a bit of a bitch and sorry minors. I try to edit my language sometimes and usually I put all the bad words in the extended entry but I had to say it. I was kind of mean to Jared. But come on how many Italian Jews do you know? My grandfather would have rolled over in is grave if my mother married a Jew, they were big time Catholics. After her mother died the church did everything for them. They even got my mom through private school. Probably should have said that out loud though.

Oh well...

Let "My wonderful recaplet..." disturb you more...

Laney broke down at 7:04 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

February 17, 2005

Another day....

Okay seriously today really did suck. I spent most of the day trying to update Ensanity.us which didn't go well. I ended up having to delete the whole database and upload it again. It was totally evil! Right now I'm just glad the front page is working. But I'm gonna have to go through and delete all the old journal entries and start over again. The site is suppose to be my collective but right now it just looks like a collected mess.

I still have to go through and get Annabelle's blog set up the right way. I backed hers up already thank god. She hadn't gotten around to finish her move from her old site to her blog so everything is still in tact. She wanted to turn it into a blog slash website for her artwork. Hopefully when I get it up and running she will be happy with it. But I have to install another set of MT code just for her. It's a small pain.

Tomorrow, well today really, should be interesting though...

Let "Another day...." disturb you more...

Laney broke down at 12:41 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

February 15, 2005

Updating MovableType

Okay seriously updating MT is such a freaking b*tch! I had to delete everything and then re-upload it because something was funky about the way things were being displayed in the mt file and I couldn't turn on TypeKey. But anyway everything is set up the way it should be. Well. This main page is anyway. I have to go and update three other weblogs before I can go back and fix the comment and archive templates so please bare with me.

Hopefully this will put an end to the comment spamming and keep those people at TotalChoice happy. They shut down Ensanity.us! FOR NO FREAKING REASON!

GAH!!!

Well time to get ready for work. TTYL!

Laney broke down at 11:41 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

February 8, 2005

And the band played...

I'm so in love with my new laptop right now. I have MS Word installed which means that I'll be able to do some work on this paper I have due next week and off course there is the dvd player but I think my boss would get mad at me for watching DVD's in the art gallery, yeah probably not a good idea. Oh well. It's almost time for me to get up and start facing the day now.

I've been up since like 5:30am but I haven't really gotten out of bed because I have this weaked evil headach that I had when I went to sleep. I knew it was a migrain headach because of how much even the smallest bit of light was hurting my eyes, I couldn't even read the tv guide on the tv screen. Luckly I know what time and channel Crossing Jordan is on by heart so I just programmed the VCR. Yeah I still have one. Granted I would like a Tivo, but someone else is going to have to pay the 200 for the thing and then the 300 for the lifetime recording fee.

Okay well hopefully I will start posting more now. I don't really have more time or anything there are just a few more interesting things going on in my life right now.

For example:

Let "And the band played..." disturb you more...

Laney broke down at 9:31 AM | (1) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

February 1, 2005

NEW YEAR!

I feel awful! I haven't posted in forever. I've been really busy trying to get my life together before I started school. So here is a list of things that I have done.

I've changed my major. I'm now majoring in Social Work which I'm really excited about. I kind of always wanted to do Social Work but my parents weren't so keen on it. But I now have the major I want so yea!

I have a brand new laptop which is great. It's not the best one out there but it's got all the basics and that's all I need! I'm so excited about it.

I'm going back on my meds, finally. My health insurance finally let me go back to my old PCP so I got my Rx renewed. I am currently taking Effexor which is wicked expensive but works good. Woohoo!

So that's my little recap for now. I'm going to go online and try to find some new mood icons! TTYL!

NO SPAM POSTING!

Laney broke down at 8:38 PM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

December 23, 2004

Merry Holidays!

Hi everyone! Have a really good holiday! I'll be in MD for the next few days! TTYL!

The Greatest Gift Would Be NO EVIL COMMENT SPAMMERS!

Laney broke down at 7:47 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

December 17, 2004

Finals!

They are over! Thank god. Of course now I'm sick as a dog from all the stress. My body can't stop shaking. It's kind of weird. Well I'm going to go get ready for work now. Yea for Friday!

Laterz

STOP WITH THE COMMENT SPAMMING! IT'S EVIL!

Laney broke down at 9:36 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

December 8, 2004

Well new year...

So I'm not doing well in school but I'm going to do better! I'm going to get a full time job and then go to school part time. I'm really excited because this is really wanted to do. I really can't concentrate on more than two classes at a time. The only problem. It's going to take me ten years to finish. Oh well!

TTYL!

Laney broke down at 9:56 PM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

December 3, 2004

Friends....

I'm so totally screwed. My friend called me this moring and she sounded really upset but I was in my sleep deprived state so I just let her hang up. Now I don't know what to do. She sounds like she is mad at me. And she is one of my best friends in the whole world. I'll be totally crushed if she stops talking to me. I'm already crushed cause I feel like she will stop talking to me.

:( :'(

Laney broke down at 9:30 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

December 2, 2004

Stupid history class!

In about three hours I have to go to my history class which I've been excused from for the last few weeks because of the hip/thigh ingury that I have. Which by the way isn't getting any better because hello, I totally tripped the other day and went and screwed it up again!

We had another attack of evil spammers again. Stuipd spammers. I am not sure why they post here. Like I said before, hardly anyone comes here, if they do they don't leave any comments. I wish I could say that I come here more but because of school I don't. That reminds me. It's time to register for classes again. I have to register for a whole bunch. I'm so not ready to pay for them though. We will see what happens.

Well TTYL!

Laney broke down at 4:44 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

November 23, 2004

Spammers!

The evil spammers have attacked yet again! I really don't understand why they keep coming back here. I'm very sorry that they do. I hope that people aren't going to stop coming because of them. Anyway I think it's sick of them to post links to sites about incest when this is the web blog of someone who was sexually abused by her brother. Tell me that's not sick! You people are seriously messed up and are pissing me off to no end. I know you probably won't stop posting your sick links but I'm begging you not to.

I was sexually abused and then later raped for christ sakes! I don't want your stupid porn links de-grading my site and my life anymore than it has already been de-graded. So just fuck off!

On a happier note I'll be leaving day after tomorrow for DE. God I really wish I was going back to MD instead but stupid everything has to be in DE. It's evil really. Well TTYL!

Laney broke down at 1:29 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

November 15, 2004

Woohoo! It's Monday

Okay my hip is totally killing me. I even asked my freaky co-worker what he thought it could be. I only ask him things like that when I think it's really really needed. He knows a lot about muscles and stuff so most of the time he understands, and if you aren't like too graphic about it you don't have to worry about how much of a prevert he is. Anyway he had no clue. But what is hurting is the area right where around where my hip meets my pelvis but only in the front. And then the back of my thigh. It's killing me. I can't fall asleep cause it hurts so much. And it hurts when I sit or lay down. It's evil!

Okay so since I found out that the guy that I like is totally in love with someone else, who happens to be a very good friend of mine, I've been kind of down. Okay very down! But I'm trying to cheer up. I need to! My friend in DC says that I should totally try to get back at him and tell the girl he likes about the crush but I don't know if I can. I mean, if it was last year I probably would but right now the most important thing to me is that Emmitt is resting his head on my foot. I know that sounds weird but it's really cute. Emmitt isn't a cuddler but when he does it feels great cause his fur is extra soft. (is in heaven). My point is it doesn't really matter because well it's just part of life so why fight it.

God I don't think I can go to class tomorrow/today. At least not my first one. My hip hurts to much. Oh well. I'll e-mail my teacher to let her know. I just wish this whole hip thing would go away and that I could get on with my life. Fuck maybe I'll just move to a different city. Somewhere were it's not so fucking cold! Sorry but if I can talk about child abuse then I should be able to use that word. UGH!

This is so troublesome.

Laterz!
:( :x

Laney broke down at 1:50 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

November 14, 2004

Again with the spammers!

Okay seriously! Why are you spamming me? No one comes to this site except for me! And I don't even come every day! I mean my life isn't that interesting so that people come here and see what I write every day! So stop with the spamming already!

On the plus side I just ordered pineapple pizza. Oh and I'm watching CCS. That's Card Captor Sakura for those of you out there who don't know about it. I love it. I now have 6 out of 18 of the DVD's. I don't have the first season yet but I have most of the second and third season. And it's so funny. Right now I'm watching the one where Kereberos first meets Spinel Sun but that's when Spinel Sun is in his Suppi form and Kereberos is in his Kero form, they are both too cute! I'll write more after my pizza comes!

Laterz!

Laney broke down at 11:26 PM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

November 9, 2004

Woohoo!

It's Tuesday, it's Tuesday! Why am I so excited? Because I made it all the way through Monday! Plus tomorrow I'll get to meet new Vitamin Shoppe people. Since a lot of guys who like to work out decided to work at good ol' VS there is a chance that one of them might be really cute. Granted he won't flirt with me or anything but it's always nice to work with cute people.

There was this one guy that used to work for us, every girl was in love with him. Okay not in love with him but he was really hot. He was also engaged. So we never tried to make a move on him but he was just nice to work with. *grins*

Well I'm being forced to go home for X-mas and for Thanksgiving. I don't mind so much for Thanksgiving. But for X-mas. I would like to go down a little bit longer so I can at least see my friends. I think for X-mas I'll only stay a few days and come back here ASAP so I can go back later when everyone isn't trying to spend time with their families and they can spend time with me!

I'm working on a new work out schedule. I want to loose at least five pounds before X-mas. Five isn't a lot, but it will at least put me a little bit closer to my BMI and probably no one will be able to tell but me but that's not the point. I am doing this for my health.

And now I'm gonna be late for school! AHH! MUST GO TO SCHOOL!

Laney broke down at 7:55 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

November 7, 2004

Evil Spammers!

Seriously people. You need to find something better to do than to spread links to sites that people don't want to go to. Geez!

Anyway nothing much has been going here. I'm sorry the Cams are still down. When I say nothing much has been going on I mean in the way of, I'm too busy with school to do much of anything else other than to work on that.

However. I did get a DVD burner which is really cool! Woohoo! Don't ask me how to use it. I'm still trying to figure that out. But you know. I like it anyway cause it also burns CDs. Anyway...

I got my key back from Jared, finally. The jerk left in the safe at work and didn't tell me about it. Can you believe that! If someone gave me their key so I could look after their pets I would asked how they wanted the key back. Whatever. No birthday card for him!

I can't get in touch with my friend Sue. I don't know what's going on with her. I'm a little worried. I left like 15 messages. I'm not kidding, there were actually probably more. I'll have to start calling her again later today. She might be asleep right now. Unlike me who hasn't been able to go to sleep these last few days. I don't know why at all either.

Well TTYL!

Laney broke down at 1:13 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

November 3, 2004

Packin' it up...

Alright. I'm totally moving to Sweden! I have lost my faith in the American people. Okay not really. I love America. I love the American people. I just really really don't like George Bush. And I wish he hadn't won the election. Granted they are saying it's not over yet but, well it seems like it is. So I'm going online right now and getting ready for my big move to Sweden. Granted I don't speak the language but at least they will stay neutral during the World War 3 that Bush is going to cause.

Oh well, I always wanted to move to Europe.

Laney broke down at 8:40 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

November 1, 2004

Back from vacation!

So my mini-break is over. I'm back in Boston. There isn't really much to say right now except guys suck! I'm sorry. But I totally asked this guy if he liked another girl, keep in mind that I did and probably still do like this guy. But he totally lied to me. He totally told me that he thought the other girl was cute but that he didn't like her. EVIL! Evil lying guy!

Laney broke down at 3:16 PM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

October 28, 2004

Vacation!

So I'm leaving a few hours to go to MD and then from there I'll be going to DE. I won't be able to post anything while I'm away on my mini-break. I was going to try to update the all of the Cams before I left and I even have pictures on my computer but I don't have time to resize them so the Cams are just going to have to not be updated!

Sorry everyone! Anyway I'm going to finish the last few things that I need to do and then I'm out of here.

BTW! THE RED SOX WON THE WORLD SERIES!!!!!! OMG! It was totally awesome!

TTYL!

Laterz!

Laney broke down at 11:54 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

October 26, 2004

No time to say hello, goodbye.

I'm late, I'm late, I'm late! Eek! I have I think four maybe five water colors that I have to finish for tomorrow. I best start working. Today was okay. My drawing teacher was being his usually self, a dick, but I'm used to it by now. The guy, Jared, who I asked to take care of my pets while I'm in MD and DE hasn't called me back.

But my Art History teacher was so nice to me today that I felt I owed it to her to try to stay up for the whole class. I took two Brain Pep's before the class started because she called me yesterday since I'd been missing class. I felt staying up for the full class was the least that I could do.

I started up knitting again. I'm really excited about it too. I might take some classes at Windsor Button to help me start up again. I want to take the beginners class again but I have a feeling that if I do the teacher will yell at me why am I taking it again, I came in knowing a lot of the basics already so... But I like to work on my technique, is that such a crime. Plus I'm a really slow knitter still. She told me last time that I have to keep practicing so that I can speed up!

I'll be leaving for DC in just a few short days and when I do there will be no CityCam or PetCam while I'm gone. Sorry folks. Anyway time to start painting. TTYL!

Laney broke down at 6:52 PM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

October 25, 2004

Ugh! Mondays...

God why are Mondays the worst day of the week. I don't like Mondays. I get my art class but my lit class. Anyway nothing exciting happen. I don't know what else to say. Oh I updated my webcams! Woohoo!

Laney broke down at 11:25 PM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

October 24, 2004

Evil comment spammer! Stop spamming people. It's evil!

So I was getting spammed. It's so stupid. People hardly come to this site as it is. Anyway I installed MT-Blacklist so take that evil spammer. God, you have nothing better to do than to spam me 70 times in one hour! Geez!

Time to get ready. I feel much better today. I can't figure out what was going on though. I still haven't had my period. Which is okay I just hope I don't get while I'm in MD. Oh well I better pack some tampons just in case. My mom has already gone through menopause so no help from her. If I get my period then I better damn well have tampons. Let me tell you the last time I didn't have any, big problems!

Later everyone!

Laney broke down at 9:43 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

October 23, 2004

Too sick to party....

Yeah I was too sick to do any cam pictures today. Sorry. Maybe later on tonight if I feel up to getting something to eat. We'll see...

Sorry everyone!

Laney broke down at 8:40 PM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

The Ultimate Personality Test

I took The Ultimate Personality Test @ web.Tickle.com Here is what it said about me. Other than the fact that I took too much brain pep today failed my test and am PMS'ing to like the 10th degree:

Laney, you're an Observer!

This means you're one of the more kind-hearted people around. You are unusually intuitive, and you probably understand yourself, as well as others. That also means you're a good mediator � though you may prefer to spend more time on your own than most.

You are better equipped than many to steer your life in the right direction. Understanding more about the components of your personality will reveal unique information that even people like you might not realize. And the better you know yourself, the more confident you'll be making decisions that affect your life.

Laney broke down at 7:04 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

I love PMS! Not!

I am so in love with Bored.com right now. They directed me to the best site ever. It's so funny. The site is called PickupHelp.com and it has some pick up lines that guys use on women. Very silly and it made me smile. At the same time. No guy has every used one of these on me so it kind of made me sad too but right now if any guy tried to use one of these lines on me I would beat him to a bloody plup. Beware the short latina girl who is PMS'ing. Anyway here are some the more stupid lines that I thought were really funny:

-Are you a parking ticket? (What?) You got fine written all over you.
-Pick up a pack of sugar that actually says, "sugar" on it and say, "You dropped your nametag!". (really can't picture any guy trying to pull this off without getting a WTF!)
-Do you believe in the hereafter? Well, then I guess you know what I'm here after.
-Girl, you better have a license, cuz you are driving me crazy!
-Hey baby, you've got something on your butt: my eyes.
-Hi, I make more money than you can spend.
-Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.
-Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
-Do you have any raisins? No? How about a date?
-If you were a booger I'd pick you first.

God those last two were awful. Hell they were all awful. Geez. Really guys what are you thinking! But I have to give you props, or whatever, because at least you are telling the girl how you feel. I hate it when I end up having to play the guessing game.

Anyway I have some pictures from my window for CityCam. I'm so not leaving my house today. Ugh! I feel totally sick! I hate my fucking period. It turns me into a fucking invalid and I say fuck every other word. Fuck!

Laney broke down at 4:45 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

Ugh!

I'm failing abnormal psych! I really have to quit my job at the Vitamin Shoppe. I would have had more time to do everything. Too bad. I kind of like it there. Well not really. But some of the people are really nice. I don't know what to do. This totally sucks!

I am currently pissed of at BlogRoller. It's totally unfair that you have to pay 20 bucks just so they will only list five of the blogs that you visit on your front page. So if I don't want all the blogs I visit to be listed at once I have to pay. That totally sucks.

Also lovely event of the day I'm totally PMS'ing. I can tell that by this time tomorrow I'm going to feel like I'm loosing all of my blood. I want to have children but damn, every month I have to go through this.

Also. Does anyone know any good blogging programs. I love MT but I would like to host other blogs here. I don't know if I should though. I mean LiveJournal is so popular and it's free again so is there really a point?

Plus MT totally rocks because the let me upload my cam pictures and I can make thumbnails without actually making them. MT does it all for me.

I'm going to be making a page about me soon. That will list some info on me and when I list that page I will be making an entry on my psychological background so please be warned a head of time. Okay time to start using some PHP. I love PHP. I just hate making PHP pages because I am so not good at it!

Laney broke down at 12:13 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

October 22, 2004

11 hour sleep

I just got up after sleeping for 11 hours. Time to get ready for the day now. I'm already running late! Another test to take today. School is so evil. Oh well I guess it's just something that you have to do. I'm not really sure I want to go on for another 2 years to get my BA though. I guess we'll find out. Maybe I'll take a break and then go get my BA. But what can I do with an AA in Fine Arts? I don't want to teach. Ugh!

Laney broke down at 11:15 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

October 21, 2004

Just a quick note

I serioulsy want to drop my class. God I wish I didn't screw up so much. Anyway Mortimer is snoring. I've never heard a ferret snore before but he is. Weirdo. Lol! Sometimes he does bark in his sleep if he is having a scary dream. Well TTYL!

Laney broke down at 7:34 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

They won!

I am so happy! The Red Sox won their series. I can't believe it. I kind of fell asleep durning some of it but then I woke up and it was crazy! People were honking their horns, screaming, and everyone here is just so over joyed. I think they should close school tomorrow. They won't though.

Tomorrow I'm going to start my very own city cam. Oh yeah I live in Boston right now. So I'll be taking my camera with me and snapping one shot every day of Boston life. I hope you will all enjoy it.

I have to start studying up for my midterm now. TTYL!

Laney broke down at 3:54 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

October 20, 2004

Hello World!

I start every weblog, website, or internet related entry with this title. I am inviting you all to take a look around into my life. Turn me upside down, inside out, and every which way to see how I work. Well if you think you are ready for that.

As my disclaimer below reads this is not a weblog for the young children, unless they are going through some of the things that I have gone through. If you are not comfortable with you child reading about child abuse or rape and the process of recovering from these events then do not let them read this.

Well this is just my first post because I have finally gotten this thing to run the way I want it to. I'll post more later! TTYL!

Laney broke down at 3:10 AM | (0) were disturbed | (0) have TrackBack

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Damaged-Girl[dot]Net Disclaimer:
The happenings of a survivor...

My name is Laney Marie, well that's my nick name anyway and it's the name that I choose to go by. Due to the nature of this weblog I wish to maintain some anonymity. Also this description is to serve as a warning to parents of younger children. So please pay attention:

When I was two (2) years old I was sexually abused. The situation of course was well handled by Child Protective Services and my parents. When I was seventeen (17) years old I fell victim to what they call an acquaintance rape, meaning that I was raped be someone who I knew.

This weblog will be a record of my journey through recover. At times some of the entries well be dark and will discuss the events around both incidents. Other times this will merely be a record of things that have happened to me throughout my day.

I have chosen to publish this weblog to help others out there who have gone through the same thing. Also to help parents understand what their children are going through.

Feelings do not make sense, they are made out of gray area, so please while you try to apply logic to I have gone through and what I am going through keep that in mind.