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Anonymous:

Hello! I was raped 3 times in the last few months by the same person and I’ve been coping okay on and off. I have told one of my good friends, but he just doesnt understand and I keep getting triggered and then freaking out, and I get almost no sleep, and when I do, I wake up crying and it is really scary, and I was just wondering if you have any methods you could share with me to help me cope with all this? my rapist used to be one of my best friends.

One of the biggest things I can tell you is that you really should go see a therapist, someone who has experience working with rape victims.  I really started to recover after I worked with my therapist.  My sleep got better and I got better at identifying my triggers.

If for some reason you cannot go to therapy then try to notice what things trigger you.  People are split 50/50 on how to handle triggers but I find that knowing your triggers and avoiding them works best.  At least until you are more emotional ready to handle dealing with your trigger.

If you can pick out a trigger you can try to examine it and see why it makes you react the way you do.  However, this is something that you really should do with a therapist because it can be very emotional and if not done correctly could cause new triggers.

The friend that you told about the rape, ask them to make sure that the person who raped you stays away from you.  Not having to worry about seeing your rapist every day will really help you be able to get through your day more easily.

Two other things that helped me were painting with water colors and listening to classical music.  Classical music does not have any words in it so it helped not trigger things in my brain.  I was able to really concentrate on the music and tune everything else out.  Painting was nice because I could just push the paint around and not really have to care about anything else.

I hope this helps.  I really cannot stress enough that finding a therapist is important.  Please feel free to message me again.